i think an upper decker is warranted if permission is granted next time.
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Bust up in her house in a total tizzy. Make sure you are squarely in the house, not on the front porch.
Look her dead in the eyes and frantically say "I'm going to take a ****. Where do you want me to do it?"
I guarantee you she will point to the bathroom.
Don't flush.
It's not brick?
Y'all have given me much to think about before I drop the kids off on Sunday afternoon.
Next time you're able to get in that bathroom:
First, turn the water off to the toilet tank. Next, flush and empty the bowl. Sit facing the tank and take a dump in the semi-dry bowl (the key here is facing the tank so that the turd(s) get stuck on the front gentle slope of the bowl). Finally, fire up a smoke, take a few drags, put it out in the pile, close the lid, and walk away. As you walk away, take pleasure in the fact that once your deed has been discovered, she'll be jiggling the hell outta that toilet handle desperately trying to make it flush (similar to the scene with Harry from Dumb and Dumber) and by the time the water gets cut back on, she'll need to use a little elbow grease to remove the lingering dried mud slide on the front part of the bowl.
Your welcome,
DF
How can you live in Nashville and drop off the kids 20 minutes away, and pinch the loaf on the side of I55?The scenario: Married for 20 years, divorced for 5. Dropped kids off at her house at 5:15. I live 20 minutes away. Walk up to the door with kids, politely ask if I can use the bathroom ("I need to take a ****", to be precise). My ex tells me no and says that "there is a Jitney Junior around the corner". She seemingly is concerned that my **** aroma will interfere with her dinner date with the new boyfriend, scheduled toarrive at 6. I say "really" then hug and kiss kids get in truck to head home. After about 5 miles, I **** on the side of I55.
I anticipate needing to **** again when dropping off kids. Any advice?