Hot Dog Stuffed Crust's Friday News and Views

Ladies and gentlemen, this is what the world has come to. Yes, you’re looking at a pizza with a hot dog stuffed crust. There is no turning back now. This is it. This is the end. We should all leave our homes now and march together like extras in The Walking Dead towards the ocean where we’ll congregate and drown ourselves in the deep abyss. Life is not worth living once a hot dog stuffed crust hits the market.

But for curiosity’s sake, Pizza Hut recently unveiled the new hot dog stuffed crust pizza in the United Kingdom and those who have tried it are either: (a.) on death row; (b.) starving to death; or (c.) starving to death on death row. I can’t think of any other scenario where it is acceptable to eat this — even for the Brits.

Our society has survived many horrific creations — colored ketchup, Olestra, Saved By The Bell: The New Class, auto-tune, MySpace, Farmville — but this one takes the cake. No, it takes the pizza, stuffs it with swine, and serves it with a free mustard drizzle. I’m out. I’m done. I’m throwing in my bib.

Let’s move on.

 

I’m currently in Madisonville, KY with spotty Internet so let’s hit these News and Views before I lose my neighbor’s Wi-Fi…

 “I’ll be taking my talents, for college, to the University of… KENTUCKY! It’s all in the hair. There it is.

That hasn’t gotten old yet.

 Before Nerlens Noel made his commitment Wednesday night, UK commit Archie Goodwin tried to get a glimpse of the back of his head so he didn’t have to wait for the public announcement. Goodwin told The Sporting News that he begged Noel to pull his hoodie off and reveal his pick, but the No. 1 player in the land kept it hidden until he took the set with Dari Nowkhah. “It shocked me when I saw what it was,” Goodwin said. Like we mentioned on here Wednesday night, Noel said Goodwin called him immediately after Kentucky’s win over Kansas and begged him to come to UK so they could do the same thing.

 This.

That’s all.

 Moments after Nerlens Noel committed to Kentucky on Wednesday night, Archie Goodwin and Alex Poythress hit the recruiting trail, and they did so without having to leave the ESPN studio. As Anthony Bennett tells it, Archie and Alex turned to him, smiled, and said, “C’mon, man. All we need is you. You’re the missing piece.”

Bennett, 2012’s top uncommitted recruit, is considering Kentucky, although he plans to take five official visits before he decides. But if Archie and Alex have their way, Bennett will be a Wildcat by Monday. And it doesn’t hurt their campaign that all three guys are teammates for the West squad in Saturday’s Jordan Brand Classic.

 If Florida wants to land Anthony Bennett, Billy Donovan will have to juggle his roster around after picking up a commitment on Thursday. The Gators received a commitment from guard Devon Walker, putting Florida at 13 scholarship players for the 2012-2103 season. That doesn’t necessarily eliminate Florida as a possible destination for Bennett, but they’ll have some roster adjustments to make if he’s chooses to go to Gainesville. The full Gator roster has to help UK’s chances, if even just a little bit.

 There is a conversation we need to have before the flat top fad gets out of control. I know we all love Nerlens Noel’s style, but if we’re going to celebrate its greatness, we should call it what it is: a hi-top fade. It is not a flat top. I’m sorry. I just wanted to point out that we’re all calling it the wrong thing, although I think we’re beyond the point of return. It is awesome either way though.

 In coaching news, every Missouri sorority girl’s favorite coach, Larry Eustachy, left Southern Mississippi for the Colorado State job. Did Darnell Dodson drive him away? I’m not sure. But UK assistant Kenny Payne is rumored to be a candidate for the job in Hattiesburg.

And in other Hattiesburg news, the cajun enchilada at Crescent City Grill is to die for. It’s fresh Gulf shrimp, crabmeat, peppers, onions and pepperjack cheese rolled in a flour tortilla, topped with a spicy Creole cheese sauce and served over dirty rice. Start off with the crabmeat wontons and you’ll be trapped in a state of crabmeat euphoria.

 Did you say you wanted to see a picture of Eloy Vargas riding a horse? You didn’t? Oh. Well here it is anyway.

 Head over to CoachCal.com to check out Matt’s video interview with Calipari from the bus on the Verizon Wireless Championship Tour. There are a couple of other videos from the trip and a bunch of crisp photos as well.

 Do you think you have what it takes to be Matt Jones? Well, you’re about to get your chance. The KSTV Casting Call is back and this time it is bigger and better than ever. We’ll be holding auditions in Northern Kentucky, Lexington, and Louisville over the next month and our hope is to find someone who can sit across the desk from Matt on KSTV. I’ll have more details on the site on Friday, but your first opportunity at cn|2 stardom will be Saturday, April 21st at the Insight studio on Dixie Highway in Florence, KY. Sign-ups will be from 8:00 AM to 10:00 AM. My advice: Arrive early and dress like a winner.

 That’ll do it for now. I’ll leave you with more of Matt’s photos from Day 1 of the tour: