Top Ten Embarassing Quotes From The Tennessee Program

Smokey, the Volunteer mascot.

You know, with all the Tennessee hate going on today, it’s only fair we let them get a word in edgewise.  So for your enjoyment, 10 Tennessee program defining quotes from the last couple years.

1.) “I’ve made mistakes, I clearly did, but what I was hoping for was that some other dumbass would get on the front page and take me off the hook. I miss Lane Kiffin.” — Bruce Pearl, in reference to his NCAA violations and lying about them. Actually a pretty funny quote from Bruce, gotta give him credit.

2.)  “Now I know two jewish men who have been crucified. Lord be with my hubby’s spirit. We will get through this.” — Brandy Pearl, Bruce’s wife, making the obvious comparison between Bruce and Jesus.

3.) “We have weapons. We’ve still got weapons… That’s terrible.”  — Bruce again, this time discussing how his team will respond due to the suspension of four Vols for being in possession of an illegal handgun.

4.) “Tennessee is a Ferrari, Kentucky is a Range Rover.” — Bobby Maze, talking about the differences in the all time winningest program and the… 40th? Yeah, 40th.

5.) “You don’t want to go to a college where they ain’t pretty.” — Marcus Lattimore in reference to his recruiting visit at Tennessee when the whole Hostess thing blew up. Lattimore – obviously – didn’t attend Tennessee.

6.) “It dawned on me–Lane Kiffin told us that he hoped the fans would understand. I thought ‘Well, naming the wastewater plant for him would let him know, I think very clearly, we do understand. We want to memorialize his stay here, and I think this would be doing it appropriately.” — Drew McElroy in reference to his decision to apply to change the name of the Knoxville sewage treatment plant to the Lane Kiffin Sewage Treatment Plant.

7.) “He would end up pumping gas for the rest of his life like all the other players from that state who had gone to South Carolina.” — Allegedly uttered by Lane Kiffin to or about recruit Alshon Jeffery, though Lane has denied it for obvious reasons.

8.) “I love the fact that Urban had to cheat and still didn’t get him.” — Lane begins his series of unfortunate events (NCAA violations,) as he recruits Urban Meyer of a violation… and commits one himself.

9.) “I’ve got a tough job. I’ve got to put these guys from different worlds together, right? I’ve got guys from Chicago, Detroit … I’m talking about the ‘hood! And I’ve got guys from Grainger County, where they wear the hood.’‘ — Bruce Pearl makes a KKK Joke! Oh Brucie, we love you so.

10.) “We need to chat about what we got coming up. First of all, WE NEED YOU! The SEC East is tough this season and we’re fighting to rep the Big Orange right.” —  Star UT basketball player Scotty Hopson (or Hop, as he calls himself,) begs the fans to ‘fan up,’ at their home arena.  Meanwhile, Bruce Pearl denies it’s a home game – he’s never seen the arena before in his life.