Destination Weddings. They Suck. Prove me wrong.

[Dr. H Lecter]

Destination Weddings. They Suck. Prove me wrong.

It's just eloping but taking your friends and family on the ride.

I think it is wrong. This trend is ego driven and bad form IMO. Just effing elope.

When you come home have a party or wedding reception where your family and friends are. But don't make everyone pay out the *** so you can drag them to an Island or Europe or wherever your vanity takes you.

Just stop it. The wedding industry is bad enough as it is.

 

[JumperJack]

100% correct.

 

[WildcatFan1982]

I had a chapel booked in Gatlingurg and a honeymoon suite with a heart shaped tub. Guess I gotta cancel that now

 

[Dr. H Lecter]

I had a chapel booked in Gatlingurg and a honeymoon suite with a heart shaped tub. Guess I gotta cancel that now

No. You and your betrothed should do that if YOU want. But don't drag everyone else there based on their feeling a obligation to do so. Get married in her home town. Then social norms say that your out of town guests come to the brides home. Fine. But y'all dragging both sides to your choice of venue.....wrong.

 

[kyboy1998_rivals34276]

Your first wedding should be nice. Just not over the top.

 

[Dr. H Lecter]

Your first wedding should be nice. Just not over the top.

And in the brides "home turf."

 

[JonathanW_rivals]

IMO eloping is the way to go. Big weddings are a big waste of $

 

[TriangleUKCat]

I had a chapel booked in Gatlingurg and a honeymoon suite with a heart shaped tub. Guess I gotta cancel that now

Make sure to also cancel the Papa John’s delivery.

 

[Ron Mehico]

Peoples mindset is all wrong imo. It seems that some couples view it as “its a privilege that you’re invited to my wedding” but I think that’s ridiculous - you should be grateful that people want to come and celebrate you and you should make it as easy as possible for them to attend and enjoy themselves as you’re the host. Just MO anyway. We had a destination wedding in Mexico we attended that the bride and groom paid for entirely except the flight - that was amazing. Other than that the most expensive wedding I went to (which was ridiculous - was in a castle in New York where a Taylor swift music video was shot - had a caviar bar and ice Iuges - a guy rolling cigars - just ridiculous probably half a million) the couple got divorced two years later

 

[thabigbluenation]

Wasi. nvited,the wife and me and her mom and our daughter. Her side of the family. They paid discount rate and we paid a prorated something. In cancun. It was nice. All we had to was hang in the pool drinks included, all inclusive and took turns watching the kids. 3 foot deep but kids. Not in the wedding party. It was cool. Being around something we didn't have to be the adults in charge all the time. Huge help.

 

[TucsonCat]

Theyre not for you.
You not coming is a an extra benefit.
Your nieces and nephews don't want to listen to you ***** about whatever grandpa 70s Rock the dj isn't playing or the food being served.
They get to go someplace nice and be around friends they actually like, and still let mom feel good she invited her jackass deadbeat brother.

 

[gamecockcat]

It's pretty egotistical to expect friends and extended family to pay a buttload of cash to come see you get married. If the happy couple spring for a lot of the expenses, then I have no problem. But, 'hey, we want to be important enough that you'll drop thousands to come see us get married' - nope, not me.

Along those same lines, my daughter has been in multiple weddings as a bridesmaid. Flying to the the destination, hotel expenses, expensive dress that will almost assuredly be worn only the one time, new shoes, wedding gift(s), etc. I mean, how much do you expect your friend to fork out to watch YOU get married? It's ridiculous and an expensive ego trip for the bride for whom everything must be 'perfect'. Because a 'perfect' wedding day is a great predictor of a 'perfect' marriage, right?

 

[Dr. H Lecter]

Theyre not for you.
You not coming is a an extra benefit.
Your nieces and nephews don't want to listen to you ***** about whatever grandpa 70s Rock the dj isn't playing or the food being served.
They get to go someplace nice and be around friends they actually like, and still let mom feel good she invited her jackass deadbeat brother.

You are willfully ignorant I suppose. Likely projecting.

The issue is not travel. My issue is that when a girl from Cali wants to marry her KY fiancé after the graduate from UK where they live together now and HIS family is in KY...... It is perfect form and quite traditional for her parents (who pay the lions share) to have that wedding back home in Cali. When that happens it is quite normal and appropriate for HIS family and friends to make the trip to Cali. Of course HER parents will hopefully shoulder costs associated with "out of town" guests that have been baked in to wedding tradition.

It is entirely different for the couple to decide to marry in Anguilla which requires everyone on both sides to drop a buttload to witness their ego-day. Get married there if you wish but don't try to "guilt" the rest of your family into following you. Do a redux set of vows back home.

 

[LineSkiCat14]

It's not so much ego-driven (although that may be apart of it)..

What destination weddings do, is it puts the expense onto the guests that are going, because destination weddings are always cheaper for the bride and groom. And now, the guests need to fly, usually pretty far, book rooms, take time off, etc.

I think what a lot of couples do with destination weddings, is it's also a way to trim the guest list. If you don't want a big wedding, then a destination is a good way to ensure only 20 or so people close up.

When we are invited to a destination wedding (and actually go), we will turn it into our own vacation for the hassle. Instead of two nights in the Bahamas, we will make it 5, and that way we actually get something out of it.

Weddings are a real sham.. just all of it. The cost, the stress, the drama that you inevitably have to deal with amongst family members.

 

[LineSkiCat14]

Wedding times and dates are just as important. It needs to be a Friday or Saturday. These weddings that are on a Thrusday or Sudnay are complete BS to the people going.

I once had a Sunday wedding that was out of town for all the guests, and it was December 22nd. So here's every traveling a good 2-4 hours away, on a Sunday night, when everyone is trying to wrap up all the things they need to do for Christmas. And why? Because the bride and groom saved a **** ton of money. Eff those people.

 

[Dr. H Lecter]

Wedding times and dates are just as important. It needs to be a Friday or Saturday. These weddings that are on a Thrusday or Sudnay are complete BS to the people going.

I once had a Sunday wedding that was out of town for all the guests, and it was December 22nd. So here's every traveling a good 2-4 hours away, on a Sunday night, when everyone is trying to wrap up all the things they need to do for Christmas. And why? Because the bride and groom saved a **** ton of money. Eff those people.

And since you brought it up....there is another thing going on with the "destruction" of the traditional wedding. This is the mover away from having a "Priest or Pastor" etc... doing the service. This is a move away from church and creating the new fad of having one of your friends marry you. His authority to do so comes from the "World Wide Church of the Internet." It takes the seriousness of the ceremony and the concept that you are making your vows before God and the Church....

 

[d2atTech]

Destination Weddings. They Suck. Prove me wrong.

It's just eloping but taking your friends and family on the ride.

I think it is wrong. This trend is ego driven and bad form IMO. Just effing elope.

When you come home have a party or wedding reception where your family and friends are. But don't make everyone pay out the *** so you can drag them to an Island or Europe or wherever your vanity takes you.

Just stop it. The wedding industry is bad enough as it is.

there, fixed it for you. Congrats however on what I assume is your marriage!

 

[tallkat70]

And since you brought it up....there is another thing going on with the "destruction" of the traditional wedding. This is the mover away from having a "Priest or Pastor" etc... doing the service. This is a move away from church and creating the new fad of having one of your friends marry you. His authority to do so comes from the "World Wide Church of the Internet." It takes the seriousness of the ceremony and the concept that you are making your vows before God and the Church....

Not a religious guy here but respect the institutions, and was at wedding a couple of months ago, very nice ceremony, local but no expense was spared on venue, catering full cocktail hour and apps, dinner, open bar all night but the person who was the officiant of the wedding was some friend of the couple and the whole service was a stand-up routine for him. I mean the whole thing doesn't have to be solemn but you could have had someone doing rimshots after every line. The guy made it completely about himself, it was really bizarre.

 

[vhcat70]

Destination Weddings. They Suck. Prove me wrong.

It's just eloping but taking your friends and family on the ride.

I think it is wrong. This trend is ego driven and bad form IMO. Just effing elope.

When you come home have a party or wedding reception where your family and friends are. But don't make everyone pay out the *** so you can drag them to an Island or Europe or wherever your vanity takes you.

Just stop it. The wedding industry is bad enough as it is.

So why did you go then?

 

[Dr. H Lecter]

So why did you go then?

I am making an observation. I've had several of these pop up recently and one was where the grooms family was not wealthy, the brides side is. I just thought that it will be hard for the grooms side to save up a bunch of money to fly off for a ego-driven (bride) destination wedding. Just my opinion, as well as the cascading events surrounding that type of thing. Fr. Joe cannot officiate a wedding at "Martha's Vineyard."

 

[Dr. H Lecter]

Not a religious guy here but respect the institutions, and was at wedding a couple of months ago, very nice ceremony, local but no expense was spared on venue, catering full cocktail hour and apps, dinner, open bar all night but the person who was the officiant of the wedding was some friend of the couple and the whole service was a stand-up routine for him. I mean the whole thing doesn't have to be solemn but you could have had someone doing rimshots after every line. The guy made it completely about himself, it was really bizarre.

I've been to a few of these recently and it is the same thing. The dude is a friend who is doing his first gig. They do a decent enough job but you are right...its a comedy routine because the friend knows where all the dirty laundry is buried.

 

[UKWildcats1987]

Just go to the courthouse. Spend the money elsewhere.