Favorite holiday tradition?
- Thread starter MrLair
- Start date
Glen Rogers killed that little girl. Then he went and killed Nicole Brown Simpson and the guy she was with.
Throwing a virgin into a volcano to appease the Space Pope.
Getting drunk and calling all my Jewish friends asking why they had to kill my lord and savior.
Skip X-mas eve service to sample as many different Christmas beers as possible while wrapping gifts.
Watch QVC for at least 12 hours (typically more). Never buy anything but it's fun to dream.
Every year we do a turkey launch at the local fire department. We shove a hose up a frozen turkey's *** and see how far we can launch those sumbitches. The locals let us fire at them and if they catch it, after marking the distance, they get to keep it.
I go around and put bows and tags on all of the water faucets, light switches and all the food in the refrigerator. If the kids don't like those gifts they can get a damn job.
Drinking peppermint schnapps out of a stripper's navel. Really gets me in the mood for the season tbh.
Singing Kwaanza Carols at Popeye's.
Admit it.... that is not the only day you give it up.... I kid.
Denny's...
American Christmas Tradition.
American Christmas Tradition.
eating chinese food with the lowensteins on christmas day. good people. too bad they're going to hell.
For whatever reason, I like A Christmas Story being on 24 hours may not even watch all of one but I am glad it's there.
We watch How the Grinch Stole Christmas and I always use it as a teaching moment. I especially use the end of the story, when the Grinch tries to do good by bringing the stuff back and his heart grows three sizes in one day. I explain to the children that cardiomegaly runs in our family too, is a sign of imminent death, and no bullisht karma of good deeds is going to change a damn thing so the moral is to take that isht and keep on trucking until that bloated blood pumper busts.
Sometimes? What's wrong, not as limber as you used to be?:grimace:
Not a tradition but one year when we exchanged gifts I went into the bedroom, stripped off, tied a bow on it, jumped out and said Merry Christmas. My wife said "that's not fair, I got you a big gift"
I like to go to Enterprise Rent-A-Car and get a new car and put a big red bow on it. Then when the wife goes to sleep, I will put it in the driveway. You should see the look on her face when she thinks she gets a new car like in those commercials. I then tell her to make sure it is returned tomorrow so we don't get charged another day.
Another fun option is to park the car in a random driveway with the bow on it and when that wife comes out excited about her new car, I come over and say sorry it was delivered to the wrong house. Then you move it to their neighbor's house for that upset wife to be able to see it still and watch as she is pissed that the neighbor bought his wife a new car and not her.
Fun times.
Another fun option is to park the car in a random driveway with the bow on it and when that wife comes out excited about her new car, I come over and say sorry it was delivered to the wrong house. Then you move it to their neighbor's house for that upset wife to be able to see it still and watch as she is pissed that the neighbor bought his wife a new car and not her.
Fun times.
You're one sick f$$k......my kinda guy!
Avoiding my mother-in-law by finding things to do outside until she has eaten. After that, the Z monster gets her and I am good to watch Christmas shows.