D-League

UKserialkiller

Heisman
Dec 13, 2009
34,297
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Willy has jury duty? I want to get this right so let me ponder on that thought for a moment...





Batish crazy is the defense attorney that allows willy to get thrown out of the jury pool. I mean it would have to be one seriously heinous crime committed by one seriously demented and/or deranged sociopath in order for willy to vote "guilty". Think about it.
hahaha exactly KS, exactly....
 
Apr 15, 2006
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OK, been out because of bad sinus problems. Glad flunase is OTC. Stuff works for me. Going with it.

All this pyro talk, I concur with KS (as usual).

93 I too, (concurring with KS...as usual) believe that May will be gracious for you and your wife. Yea!

Hey Willy. Wish I lived closer.

Sure happy it's Thursday. Hello too all my friends and others as well. FCC.
 
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funKYcat75

Heisman
Apr 10, 2008
32,406
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112
My jury duty experience was relatively nice. Bunch of normal, fairly educated people (or they acted like it, at least). I fully expected it to be a nightmare. Lexington is better than most places, so your mileage may vary.
 

tWildcat

Heisman
Mar 12, 2011
9,377
13,501
72
I had Jury duty once. Didn't get selected but got a call to show up at the courthouse after having to call the same number every Tuesday night from January-June. It wasn't really bad except for the initiation thing or whatever you call it.
 
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UKGrad93

Heisman
Jun 20, 2007
17,437
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May is starting to look better. Mrs. 93 has an interview with the college of nursing on 5/11/2015. They called her & talked for an hour. A few days later, emailed with a proposed interview time, then followed that up with a phone call. It would be a great fit all around. Keeping my fingers crossed.

I had jury duty last year. It was the day after the 2014 NCAA championship game. Timing was good, as it distracted me from the loss for a little while. I didn't get picked, but got to go through the selection process. I wouldn't mind being on a jury at some point. I found it kinda interesting. Maybe a little dull for most though.
 
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Nov 14, 2001
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I randomly got picked out of the "general" jury pool as one of about 30 from which they'd select the "final" 12. During the questioning (it was a child abuse case), they asked something like if any of us had any experience with abuse. One dude raised his hand and said, "I think he did it." The judge said, "Sir, you realize that this isn't the trial and that you've heard no evidence whatsoever regarding this case, right?" "Yeah, but in my opinion if it's bad enough for him to be arrested and taken to court then he's gotta be guilty." :D




:confused:
 
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funKYcat75

Heisman
Apr 10, 2008
32,406
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When you isolate the K and turn it on it's side, it looks like a half-assed "Space Invaders" invader...

 

Kaizer Sosay

Heisman
Nov 29, 2007
25,706
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I've been called for jury duty 3 times in my life. But I have never sat on a jury.

The 1st time was 9 months after my 18th birthday. Needless to say, they didn't pick me for anything but I got called in for the selection process a few times. The 2nd time was during my Senior year of college and since I was out of town for school they let me out of it. The 3rd time was a few years ago and I got out of it again because I am self employed and pleaded hardship.
 

UKserialkiller

Heisman
Dec 13, 2009
34,297
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KS: "You're honor, I can't serve jury duty because I own my business"
Judge: "well, too bad Mr. KS, you have to serve"
KS: "Your honor, have you ever ran your own business?"
Judge: "No, I've been a Judge my whole life".
KS: "Well ok, then STFU and let me go make some money"


That's how it happened, right KS?
 
Nov 14, 2001
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  • My wife is deathly afraid of mice/rats
  • I've been on a supplement, protein powder, amino acid kick lately
How can these two seemingly disparate facts be tied together you ask?

While looking for my birth certificate (to get a replacement SS card) in our computer room/armory, I happened to, well, have a gaseous expulsion. A really bad one. Not Sikeston outlet mall "OH MY GOD" bad, but pretty danged bad nonetheless. Unfortunately for me, it had legs, as in "staying power."

Amidst all the guns, ammo and knives and various other end-time supplies I couldn't find the damned certificate -- after having just seen it in there last week (why it was in there is another story). So, of course, wifey decides to help me look.

"What's that smell," she immediately asked.
Huh? What? Oh gee honey, I didn't notice anything cause I was focused on finding that touching certificate (I never do that around her cause, well, she doesn't like it and I'm trying to stay on her good side. I also don't admit to it when I have an accident).
"Is that what I think it is?"
What? You mean the wispy remnants of a corned beef sandwich topped off with some glycine/leucine/taurine metabolites?
"Did one of them die in here?"
Of course not, we've never had those anywhere in the house
"It smells just like one that's been dead awhile"
Well I can't explain that, maybe it's gunpowder from that brass in the corner.
"It's not touching gunpowder, it's a dead animal"
Well I can't smell anything, lets go look in the kitchen, maybe I put the birth certificate there (suppressing a silent surge of pride that I still got 'it')
"You know I'm leaving if I ever see one of them in here."
I promise I've never seen anything, but I'll put out some more D-Con just in case.

So apparently my lower intestine smells like decaying mice
 
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UKserialkiller

Heisman
Dec 13, 2009
34,297
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Mav- I have convinced my wife that allowing me to fart in front of her helps my prostate and that fact that if I suck those farts in, they give me belly aches. Then, I approach my wife with "Do you want me to have belly and prostate problems, huh huh huh???" Works 50% everytime!
 
Nov 14, 2001
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Mav- I have convinced my wife that allowing me to fart in front of her helps my prostate and that fact that if I suck those farts in, they give me belly aches. Then, I approach my wife with "Do you want me to have belly and prostate problems, huh huh huh???" Works 50% everytime!

:D I might have to try that one lol
 
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Kaizer Sosay

Heisman
Nov 29, 2007
25,706
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KS: "You're honor, I can't serve jury duty because I own my business"
Judge: "well, too bad Mr. KS, you have to serve"
KS: "Your honor, have you ever ran your own business?"
Judge: "No, I've been a Judge my whole life".
KS: "Well ok, then STFU and let me go make some money"


That's how it happened, right KS?

Hahahaha. Word for word.
 
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funKYcat75

Heisman
Apr 10, 2008
32,406
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112
While I weep for the future of the children in your classroom I am simultaneously laughing my head off and applauding your wizardry skills. Outstanding work, funkycat.
Thanks to our schools' constant need to test test test, I have some extree computer time this week.
 
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AustinTXCat

Hall of Famer
Jan 7, 2003
53,163
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Glad you back safely! Dude, I called into to Jury duty too. Mine is June 2nd. Something tells me tat I won't make the cut.
Hahahaha! Thanks!

Yeah, it ended early today. All the cases on the docket pleaded out. Rather than return to work, I grabbed a printed excuse and caught the bus straight home. I'm gonna lay down in a few, as an apparent case of the flu has come over me the past couple days. Really bad Tuesday and yesterday while in TN and GA.

Hope all goes well with you.
 
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UKserialkiller

Heisman
Dec 13, 2009
34,297
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Hahahaha! Thanks!

Yeah, it ended early today. All the cases on the docket pleaded out. Rather than return to work, I grabbed a printed excuse and caught the bus straight home. I'm gonna lay down in a few, as an apparent case of the flu has come over me the past couple days. Really bad Tuesday and yesterday while in TN and GA.

Hope all goes well with you.
Damn, hope you get to feeling better man. Drink some 15% abv and watch that flu shrivel up.
 
Apr 15, 2006
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Hope you get to feeling better ATC.

Got all of the weed-eating finished today. Plus, got half of the garden planted. Got about 60 ft. by 50 ft. Gonna make lots of salsa this year. Trying to get enough to last till this time next year. Goes fast around this house.

Hope your day is going well.

Hey Willy, KS, Grad, Mash, ATC, Mav., Hesh, fun, and all others. FCC.
 
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