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ex gruntled girlfriends

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DSmith21

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Everyone has to have at least one good crazy ex-girlfriend story. Tell us yours.

For me, it was the girl in high school who wanted to show her affection for me by doing something permanent. She didn't get a tattoo. Instead, this cuckoo carved my name in her arm with a razor blade and thought that I would think it was cool. I couldn't get away fast enough as I didn't want to be with someone who might take a blade to me one day. Fortunately, she went to another school so I didn't have to see her much after that. The bad thing was that she was really hot.
 
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UKserialkiller

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DSmith21 said:
Everyone has to have at least one good crazy ex-girlfriend story. Tell us yours.

For me, it was the girl in high school who wanted to show her affection for me by doing something permanent. She didn't get a tattoo. Instead, this cuckoo carved my name in her arm with a razor blade and thought that I would think it was cool. I couldn't get away fast enough as I didn't want to be with someone who might take a blade to me one day. Fortunately, she went to another school so I didn't have to see her much after that. The bad thing was that she was really hot.
Click to expand...


I wish I had a woman that loved me that much.

You prolly missed out on the best sex consistent sex of your life.
 
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DSmith21

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Willy4UK said:
I wish I had a woman that loved me that much.

You prolly missed out on the best sex consistent sex of your life.
Click to expand...

Tell us your crazy ex story Willy. I am betting that you have something off the charts.
 
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thabigbluenation

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that level of commitment is rare these days. she may have killed you in the end, but she would have offed herself too so you could be together forever. missed opportunity.
 
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DSmith21

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Willy4UK said:
Don't have any, DSmith. I never settled down long enough to develop any emotions other than "damn, I think I just squirted in your butthole"
Click to expand...

Would have thought that you at least had something like this:





 
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DSmith21

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maverick1 said:
C'mon OP, quit stalling. You've posted twice since the pic request was made.

You know the rules. You can't claim an ex-girlfriend was really hot without backing it up -- that's just GD common internet courtesy.
Click to expand...

Was +20 years ago but I wouldn't do that to her even if I still had a pic.
 
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thabigbluenation

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that type thing happened to a guy here at work. his side chick went to the bowing alley where he and his wife and kids and parents were all at and carved up and spray painted his car. then went inside and called him out in front of all of them. he worked with this chick. needless to say he isn't married anymore.
 
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Mike-D

Mike-D

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thabigbluenation said:
that type thing happened to a guy here at work. his side chick went to the bowing alley where he and his wife and kids and parents were all at and carved up and spray painted his car. then went inside and called him out in front of all of them. he worked with this chick. needless to say he isn't married anymore.
Click to expand...

[laughing]
 
LineSkiCat14

LineSkiCat14

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Aug 5, 2015
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No one is gonna believe this one, more of a break-up story:

Worked at an Irish bar in Yonkers, NY during college. Promotions, checked IDs, Karaoke (this is important), poured myself shots of Jamo.. the usual. Was dating a girl for a few months. But we sort of broke it off before the Christmas Break. Well, 2nd semester. I have work on Thursday night, the busiest night. We are still talking, and she texts me that she wants to come out to the bar. I'm reluctant, but say fine.

She comes out to the bar, and proceeds to hit on everyone and everything that ISN'T me. Right in front of me like a big F.U... So I'm pretty annoyed, and it continues. She starts hitting on local Yonkers fare.. which are some of the scummier people you'll meet. Well, I had had it. After the person doing Karaoke is done, I get up on the Mic..

"Hey everyone, thanks for coming out. Want to give a special shout out to my Ex-GF here tonight, ________! (at this point, she see's what's coming, and bolts for the door). You can find her as she's the one hitting on every guy in this place. But watch out, she's got repulsive man hands (she did) and she doesn't put out. So to the Yonkers boys running game, don't bother, she won't _____ your ____s. "

Ended it with a few more jobs and a "we're done" bit. Dropped the Mic.

I thought I was going to get killed by management and probably lose my job (Management were a bunch of off-the-boat Irish drunks, btw).. but the place went nuts. People we're cheering. My friends were going wild. Randoms coming up to me and saying it was the best thing they had ever seen. Even bartenders were pouring me shots.

To this day, college friends and bar patrons still talk about the story like it was lore.
 
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LineSkiCat14

LineSkiCat14

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However, the not so happy ending:

The YO Boys weren't too happy that I blew their chances at a hairy-handed HJ. They caught me a few weeks later when I was outside the bar and got jumped pretty bad. Not so bad that I couldn't drink the pain away after.. but bad enough that the rest of the week reallllly sucked.
 
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Xception

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My crazy was not even a girlfriend , we stayed at a common friends house and talked late that night and nothing more . I went back at 8pm the next day and she said sternly "where have you been"!!!!!!?!!! with four other people there . I knew she was crazy because it was my best friends ex and she chased him with a knife around the outside of a house .
 
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8titles_rivals270261

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Mine wasn't a gf, just a hook up. Friends gf had a buddy from work (nurse, who I am convinced are all crazy until they are older) who was decent hot but older than I was at the time. We all went out and it was obvious early on that she was giving it up. Take her home, throw it to her and then fall asleep. I wake up at about 5:00am with a very weird feeling. Roll over and this chick is staring at me. Not just staring, but like not blinking and just staring right at me. Needless to say I didn't sleep much after that. She gets up at about 8 and says, "We going to go do something tonight?" I give the stock "got **** to do" and she basically gives me the yeah whatever loom and bugs out. The friends gf tells me a couple of weeks later that she had to threaten the girl to keep her from stalking me, because she was openly talking about doing it. Crazy trick.
 
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jwheat

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Can we at least get OP ban hammered until he wants to follow the paddock rules and post a GD pic of the hot ex girlfriend

Now that that's out there.

I currently have two kids with a woman that consistently tells me she hates me and you had a HOT ***** that is carving your name on her body. I bet you're the kind of guy that won't have sex on the first date because you want to do it right.

I bet you didn't even have sex with the girl. She probably had a squeeze box personally molded by lucifer himself especially for your little Richard. What the **** is wrong with you, man?
 
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BlueVelvetFog

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LineSkiCat14 said:
No one is gonna believe this one, more of a break-up story:

Worked at an Irish bar in Yonkers, NY during college. Promotions, checked IDs, Karaoke (this is important), poured myself shots of Jamo.. the usual. Was dating a girl for a few months. But we sort of broke it off before the Christmas Break. Well, 2nd semester. I have work on Thursday night, the busiest night. We are still talking, and she texts me that she wants to come out to the bar. I'm reluctant, but say fine.

She comes out to the bar, and proceeds to hit on everyone and everything that ISN'T me. Right in front of me like a big F.U... So I'm pretty annoyed, and it continues. She starts hitting on local Yonkers fare.. which are some of the scummier people you'll meet. Well, I had had it. After the person doing Karaoke is done, I get up on the Mic..

"Hey everyone, thanks for coming out. Want to give a special shout out to my Ex-GF here tonight, ________! (at this point, she see's what's coming, and bolts for the door). You can find her as she's the one hitting on every guy in this place. But watch out, she's got repulsive man hands (she did) and she doesn't put out. So to the Yonkers boys running game, don't bother, she won't _____ your ____s. "

Ended it with a few more jobs and a "we're done" bit. Dropped the Mic.

I thought I was going to get killed by management and probably lose my job (Management were a bunch of off-the-boat Irish drunks, btw).. but the place went nuts. People we're cheering. My friends were going wild. Randoms coming up to me and saying it was the best thing they had ever seen. Even bartenders were pouring me shots.

To this day, college friends and bar patrons still talk about the story like it was lore.
Click to expand...
.
If true...this is a stars-aligned, harmonious cosmic event. I vicariously enjoy your story and raise my glass to you, sir.

If false, drink AIDS
 
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LineSkiCat14

LineSkiCat14

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I wouldn't be so cool to pull that story off without taking a licking. I'm no Casanova ..

I have another story too.. tomorrow. Let's just say a girl's car was sold by her parents and she wasn't allowed to go away to school.
 
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anon_q409idbs5m40a

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Unfortunately, I have multiple stories. First of all, after I moved to Texas in 1984 I started seeing this girl that seemed to have something going for her, but was I ever wrong! Any traumatic event would cause her to flashback to another person in her life years ago, in a few cases her ex husband, and she would begin carrying on a "conversation" with that "person". Example, she was housesitting for her boss and one of his cats died while she was there. She started running around the house calling for "Russell", whoever the hell that was, to come and see the cat. Also, I was over at her place one night and heard her hitting something that sounded like a punching bag in her room. I walked in the she was cursing and hitting her stuffed penguin that she named "Henry". Really weird stuff and I almost never got rid of her. Found out later that she had been committed for a year or so. Someone told me a few years back that she was on her sixth marriage. Can't imagine why.
 
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UKGrad93

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I had a fling with this girl once that got obsessed and boiled my kid's pet rabbit.
 
AustinTXCat

AustinTXCat

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Ran into a GD psycho here in Texas roughly 20 years ago while living in Copperas Cove. She'd lived in Lexington, KY during the 80s and 90s. Hell, yes! Home girl. Anyways, this gal showed up out of nowhere at my apartment around 2 am one morning, drunker than hell, screaming "where's my baby!". She also claimed a few weeks previously that I got her pregnant and she had to get an abortion. I refused to buy it . Good thing, as I discovered later on she got a hysterectomy years earlier.

I swore off drinking for a few years afterwards.
 
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WonderBraa

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Catscratch81 said:
Unfortunately, I have multiple stories. First of all, after I moved to Texas in 1984 I started seeing this girl that seemed to have something going for her, but was I ever wrong! Any traumatic event would cause her to flashback to another person in her life years ago, in a few cases her ex husband, and she would begin carrying on a "conversation" with that "person". Example, she was housesitting for her boss and one of his cats died while she was there. She started running around the house calling for "Russell", whoever the hell that was, to come and see the cat. Also, I was over at her place one night and heard her hitting something that sounded like a punching bag in her room. I walked in the she was cursing and hitting her stuffed penguin that she named "Henry". Really weird stuff and I almost never got rid of her. Found out later that she had been committed for a year or so. Someone told me a few years back that she was on her sixth marriage. Can't imagine why.
Click to expand...

I'm guessing the sex was great
 
LineSkiCat14

LineSkiCat14

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I feel like I may have told these on these forums before, but..

Late summer, back home from college, maybe after the first year. My buddy starts dating with his coworker, Grease summer lovin' type of ****. But, she has a friend! One who is real DTF. We organize a night out with the four of us. We're drunk, drinking all night, but not an hour or two in, she's all over me. Most sexually aggressive girl I've ever met. And I'm like 19, still look like 14.. so it's not me. Unless she likes boys, which.. well... hey a win is a win.

So we go back to my mom's, my friend and his girl leaves, but she stays. Hooked up all night. Real freak. So, come.. I'd say 4:00am, were sleeping on the couch. I can't have my Mom come down and see this, she's old school. So I tell this girl "Hey, you have to leave now, my mom's going to wake up soon and I have to go school supply shopping for going back to college".. That last part was actually true. Target run with mommy to get dorm stuff. No shame in my game.

Well, she's apparently still wasted, and like the gentleman that I am, I don't care.. cause I'm not getting into trouble. So I send her off. Now mind you, I'm a dumb 19 year old.. I'd never send someone home who's wasted now (mostly because I have my own place).

I get a call the next day from my buddy like "Dude, you're not going to believe this.."

The girl got pulled over, swerving across the double yellow. Turns out she's barefooted, and blew like a 0.2bac.

Now this girl, from what I learned in years after this, always seemed to get into trouble. Wrong place wrong time. Well, this was the last straw. Her parents sold her car the next day. Gone. Then told her she couldn't go away to school and was forced to local state school so they could keep an eye on her. Her plans of going down south were down the drain.

We're still facebook friends though! So, that's kind of cool. And she turned her life around. but, still doesn't find the story as funny as I do.
 
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Rupp'sRunt

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LineSkiCat14 said:
^^The above is really more how I'm a POS than anything else. I have a few more really bad stories, maybe I'll tell them.
Click to expand...
Agreed you're a POS. If a chick tried to make me go home that way at 4 am Id tell her I'll go explain it to your mom myself if you want. Then I'd Urinate on your dog and dedicate on your couch.
 
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