Toggle sidebar

Have you ever fired a friend?

W

wildcatwelder_rivals

Heisman
Jul 28, 2006
11,257
15,737
113
Several months ago I hired a friend ; at the time I needed the help, and he needed a job. While I'd only known him less than a year, I've known his girlfriend for over 25 years, and that was the main reason I hired him.

About a month ago I was made aware that he was discussing his religion, and his sex life with a coworker. As luck would have it, the coworker wasn't too bothered by it, but of course in this day and age these things cannot be tolerated. I had a meeting with him and spoke ab out what was, and wasn't, appropriate to discuss at work.

This morning I had a different person come to me with the same concerns, saying he had talked to her about the same things last night. I've called him in for later this morning to fire him; it will of course destroy any friendship he may have thought we had, (we didn't), but more importantly it will destroy my friendship with his girlfriend whom I've known a long time.

I truly hate it, but I suppose I should have known better than to hire him in the first place, but I thought he'd be a good employee. Just goes to show you never really know people I guess.

This is the only time I've ever hired anyone I've known outside of work. Have any of you ever had to fire someone you knew outside of work, or even a friend?
 
T

TruBluCatFan

Heisman
Dec 21, 2001
19,301
10,086
113
So was he discussing these topics on the clock or during breaks? Is he a supervisor of the other employee? Employees will talk about any range of topics. I understand why you may be concerned but think it may be a little overblown. That said, you can fire him for it. Just be ready to defend it when he files for unemployment.

Firing people was my least favorite part of being a business owner. I hated it.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Born and Raised Big Blue and santamaria78
W

wildcatwelder_rivals

Heisman
Jul 28, 2006
11,257
15,737
113
TruBluCatFan said:
So was he discussing these topics on the clock or during breaks? Is he a supervisor of the other employee? Employees will talk about any range of topics. I understand why you may be concerned but think it may be a little overblown. That said, you can fire him for it. Just be ready to defend it when he files for unemployment.

Firing people was my least favorite part of being a business owner. I hated it.
Click to expand...
Discussing these things on the clock, with females no less. He's an idiot, but I didn't know that when I hired him.
No, he is not a supervisor of any kind. Overblown? Nope, and in the company I work for they stress zero tolerance for these type of things, and rightfully so, IMO. Too often, if left unchecked, an employee will file a sexual harassment claim, and you'd better have been on top of things to defend that.
No, he is getting what he deserves, IMO. I tell everyone, I don't fire you, you fire yourselves.

And no Mash, his GF is not hot, lol.
 
W

wildcatwelder_rivals

Heisman
Jul 28, 2006
11,257
15,737
113
CatGotMyTongue said:
Yeah does she have like big, big tittles?
Click to expand...
Actually yes, but they're the big ole fat girl titties; not my cup of tea.

Sorry, no pics for those who'd like to see 'em; we're close, but not that close. Probably not going to be close much longer I'm afraid, but it is what it is I suppose.
 
Rebelfreedomeagle

Rebelfreedomeagle

All-Conference
Feb 24, 2017
2,529
4,627
113
Coworkers and friends are not the same thing. I think any reasonable adult knows this and the girlfriend may be less upset than you think.
 
W

wildcatwelder_rivals

Heisman
Jul 28, 2006
11,257
15,737
113
Rebelfreedomeagle said:
Coworkers and friends are not the same thing. I think any reasonable adult knows this and the girlfriend may be less upset than you think.
Click to expand...
Agreed. He wanted to be my friend, but I told him since I was his boss, even though he worked at a site across town, that we could not have that type of relationship outside of work, much lees at work.

The biggest issue is she's going to be asking me why I fired him, and of course I can't tell her, and wouldn't whether I knew her or not of course. Now, if she knew he was telling coworkers about their sex life together........but she will never know because I can't tell her.

Like I said, he's an idiot. He had a gravy job and threw it away.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Rebelfreedomeagle
G

Glenn's Take

Heisman
May 20, 2012
12,476
14,648
113
This is exactly why I don't speak to women at work ever unless it is about work. I would rather them think I am a dick then have to watch every word that comes out of my mouth.
 
B

Bill Derington

Heisman
Jan 21, 2003
21,353
39,179
113
Has he been written up or warned about the prior situation? Maybe you should hear his side of the story before making a decision on firing him.
 
C

CatsFanGG24

Heisman
Dec 22, 2003
22,267
27,134
0
wildcatwelder said:
The biggest issue is she's going to be asking me why I fired him, and of course I can't tell her, and wouldn't whether I knew her or not of course. Now, if she knew he was telling coworkers about their sex life together........but she will never know because I can't tell her.
Click to expand...

Who is to say he was talking about theirs?...probably running round on that friend of yours.
 
T

Tskware

Heisman
Jan 26, 2003
24,925
21,283
113
OldEvilleCat said:
Rules:
1. Never hire family
2. Never hire friends
3. Never let somebody else tell you what to do...
Click to expand...

Corollary to the above

1. Never agree to do work for family
2. Never agree to do work for friends

both generally turn out to be really bad ideas unless the project turns out really well, but they still won't want to pay you market rate, because, you know, we are pals!
 
  • Like
Reactions: wildcatwelder_rivals, wildcatsboston1984_rivals and OldEvilleCat
U

UKGrad93

Heisman
Jun 20, 2007
17,437
22,789
0
It’s strange, I think welder just likes to come here to let us know how he controls other people’s lives. I hope that welder made it clear to this guy that talking about stuff at work would get him fired. This friend agreed to work for welder apparently when no one else would.
 
B

BBUK_anon

Hall of Famer
May 26, 2005
52,358
124,843
0
wildcatwelder said:
Several months ago I hired a friend ; at the time I needed the help, and he needed a job. While I'd only known him less than a year, I've known his girlfriend for over 25 years, and that was the main reason I hired him.

About a month ago I was made aware that he was discussing his religion, and his sex life with a coworker. As luck would have it, the coworker wasn't too bothered by it, but of course in this day and age these things cannot be tolerated. I had a meeting with him and spoke ab out what was, and wasn't, appropriate to discuss at work.

This morning I had a different person come to me with the same concerns, saying he had talked to her about the same things last night. I've called him in for later this morning to fire him; it will of course destroy any friendship he may have thought we had, (we didn't), but more importantly it will destroy my friendship with his girlfriend whom I've known a long time.

I truly hate it, but I suppose I should have known better than to hire him in the first place, but I thought he'd be a good employee. Just goes to show you never really know people I guess.

This is the only time I've ever hired anyone I've known outside of work. Have any of you ever had to fire someone you knew outside of work, or even a friend?
Click to expand...

I have recommended and hired several people I have known. Some I've known for a short time and some a lot longer. My first statement to them is; "I will recommend you but after that you are on your own.) The biggest thing you can do when hiring or referring someone you know is to tell them why, AND how far you will go. I have hired people I've known in the private sector and public sector. i have also recommended and had hired people in the government.

To the people I have hired or recommended in the public and private sector I have always made that statement. I also tell them I will not vouch for them after they start. It is up to them to keep their job. A business runs to be profitable. (Private and public) (I use private and public for small business and large businesses. I have hired and fired in both sectors.)

If you do anything tied to emotions you have to set the ground rules. (And repeat them as needed.) If a person/friend doesn't perform after that my conscience is clear.

You are correct. In some, if not most instances you never know how someone you hire will perform. You just cannot pre-judge that. Hiring and firing is expensive. I feel for you concerning that part of it. One thing I find is, the person on the receiving end of being fired doesn't care much about your feelings or your families for that matter if it is a private business. My work ethic is; Do what you say you are going to do and do it consistently. if they doubt after that, it is on them.

I hope it works out for you...
 
  • Like
Reactions: wildcatwelder_rivals
W

wildcatwelder_rivals

Heisman
Jul 28, 2006
11,257
15,737
113
Bill Derington said:
Has he been written up or warned about the prior situation? Maybe you should hear his side of the story before making a decision on firing him.
Click to expand...
Yes, this is his 2nd offense; I should have let him go after the first time, but I thought I got my point across in a strong way that first time; apparently I didn't, or like I said, he's an idiot. I'm going with the latter.
 
W

wildcatwelder_rivals

Heisman
Jul 28, 2006
11,257
15,737
113
UKGrad93 said:
It’s strange, I think welder just likes to come here to let us know how he controls other people’s lives. I hope that welder made it clear to this guy that talking about stuff at work would get him fired. This friend agreed to work for welder apparently when no one else would.
Click to expand...
Gotta admit, this took me by surprise. No, I rarely post on the Paddock, and I don't think my posting history would show I try to control others' lives. (I don't, and don't want to. I do well to manage my own life, lol)

I'm the type of manager that tries to make those who work under me live's better. I have people who've worked under me for 15 years who have recommended many others.

I had just taken over a "problem contract", and was asked to right the ship as it were. Turnover was a big problem, among other things, and I gave the guy a job because he needed one, and I needed people at the time. Now......I have people asking to be transferred to that account.
I'm fair to everyone, and have instituted several programs that have seen morale go through the roof. Again, kind of surprised by your post UKGrad93, not sure where that came from, but anyway, have a good day.
 
  • Like
Reactions: UKGrad93
W

wildcatwelder_rivals

Heisman
Jul 28, 2006
11,257
15,737
113
BBUK said:
I have recommended and hired several people I have known. Some I've known for a short time and some a lot longer. My first statement to them is; "I will recommend you but after that you are on your own.) The biggest thing you can do when hiring or referring someone you know is to tell them why, AND how far you will go. I have hired people I've known in the private sector and public sector. i have also recommended and had hired people in the government.

To the people I have hired or recommended in the public and private sector I have always made that statement. I also tell them I will not vouch for them after they start. It is up to them to keep their job. A business runs to be profitable. (Private and public) (I use private and public for small business and large businesses. I have hired and fired in both sectors.)

If you do anything tied to emotions you have to set the ground rules. (And repeat them as needed.) If a person/friend doesn't perform after that my conscience is clear.

You are correct. In some, if not most instances you never know how someone you hire will perform. You just cannot pre-judge that. Hiring and firing is expensive. I feel for you concerning that part of it. One thing I find is, the person on the receiving end of being fired doesn't care much about your feelings or your families for that matter if it is a private business. My work ethic is; Do what you say you are going to do and do it consistently. if they doubt after that, it is on them.

I hope it works out for you...
Click to expand...
Excellent post sir, and I agree 100% on all points.
 
  • Like
Reactions: BBUK_anon
U

UKGrad93

Heisman
Jun 20, 2007
17,437
22,789
0
wildcatwelder said:
Gotta admit, this took me by surprise. No, I rarely post on the Paddock, and I don't think my posting history would show I try to control others' lives. (I don't, and don't want to. I do well to manage my own life, lol)

I'm the type of manager that tries to make those who work under me live's better. I have people who've worked under me for 15 years who have recommended many others.

I had just taken over a "problem contract", and was asked to right the ship as it were. Turnover was a big problem, among other things, and I gave the guy a job because he needed one, and I needed people at the time. Now......I have people asking to be transferred to that account.
I'm fair to everyone, and have instituted several programs that have seen morale go through the roof. Again, kind of surprised by your post UKGrad93, not sure where that came from, but anyway, have a good day.
Click to expand...
I was just flipping you ****.
 
  • Like
Reactions: wildcatwelder_rivals
W

wildcatwelder_rivals

Heisman
Jul 28, 2006
11,257
15,737
113
Get Bucket$ said:
How did it go?
Click to expand...
It will occur at 7am tomorrow due to a "situation" with the client over national hours billable that hit me this morning. Got it worked out, but the guy had to go home and sleep so I had to delay it until in the morning.

I've got him working with a man tonight, and they will be apart anyway, so it's all good.

This part of the job sucks, no matter who it is you're having to let go. I enjoy meeting people, interviewing them, hiring them, training them and watching them grow. Every single supervisor I have right now started new with me and grew into their current role, and frankly, I'm proud of that, and I'm very proud of them.

I do not expect it to go well, he feels he's been passed over, (he has, of course, for obvious reasons). I hope he can learn from this and move on to bigger and better things.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Get Buckets
W

wildcatwelder_rivals

Heisman
Jul 28, 2006
11,257
15,737
113
the nail at the foul line said:
http://www.fox5ny.com/news/police-man-stabs-boss-after-being-fired-from-restaurant
Click to expand...
Damn, that's some **** right there. Mine went MUCH better than I expected; he actually hugged me when he left.

Sat him down, explained why I had no choice but to let him go, and that I wanted him to learn from his mistakes, work on correcting them, and grow as a person. Nice talk, and I wished him the best. I gave him some training tools to help him in some of the areas he needs help in, and, what I hope was some good advice to follow in the years ahead.

Maybe that's why I've never been killed when I fire someone, I try to send them off with some advice and tools to help them grow. :fistbump:
 
  • Like
Reactions: entropy13
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top Bottom