SEC Basketball Seinfeld Index: December 7
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SEC Basketball Seinfeld Index: December 7

It was a bad week for SEC Basketball.

On Monday, everything was looking up for the league; four teams were in the Top 25, three in the Top 10, with both Florida and Texas A&M ranked ahead of Kentucky. Take that, narrative! Then came Monday night. Florida lost to Florida State at home and, if that wasn’t bad enough, really face planted with a loss to Loyola-Chicago last night. Meanwhile, Texas A&M fell to Arizona in the Valley of the Sun Showcase.

So, is SEC Basketball bad? Or was it just a bad week? Here’s my weekly breakdown of the league, as told by Seinfeld GIFs.


“Not that there’s anything wrong with that”

 #7 Texas A&M (7-1)

This week: Lost to Arizona (67-64)

Texas A&M lost to an Arizona team that was once ranked #2 in the country before falling out of the polls for three straight losses in the Bahamas. Clearly, the Wildcats have a ton of potential, so the Aggies’ loss isn’t nearly as devastating as Florida’s losses this week; however, the fact that Texas A&M couldn’t make the plays to win down the stretch is a little alarming, as is the fact that Robert Williams has only scored four points in each of the last four games.

“These pretzels are makin’ me thirsty”

 #8 Kentucky (7-1)

This week: Beat Harvard (79-70)

Kentucky’s win over Harvard didn’t tell us anything we didn’t already know. The Cats made a really promising run in the second half to go up 20 and then coasted back into bad habits. They’re young, they let go of the rope, they need to learn, yada yada yada. Thankfully, they’re getting plenty of chances to learn with weeklong breaks between games. I was ready for the schedule to slow down a little, but now, I’m thirsty for some more Kentucky basketball, please.


 #5 Florida (5-3)

This week: Lost to Florida State (83-66) and Loyola-Chicago (65-59)

Did Duke break Florida? Since the Gators lost to the Blue Devils in the finals of the PK80, they’ve looked like a totally different team. On Monday, they got routed by Florida State and last night, lost to a Loyola-Chicago team that didn’t even have its starting point guard. Woof. Last night’s terrible loss proved that if the Gators aren’t making their threes, they’re garbage.


 #24 Tennessee (6-1)

This week: Beat Georgia Tech (77-70)

After losing to #5 Villanova in the Battle 4 Atlantis, the Vols have won three straight. On Sunday, they beat Georgia Tech in Atlanta, their fourth win over an ACC team if you count their exhibition win over Clemson; that was enough to earn them a spot in the Top 25.

 Alabama (7-2)

This week: Lost to UCF (65-62); Beat Rhode Island (68-64)

After losing to UCF at home, Alabama fell out of the polls and didn’t look much better vs. Rhode Island. The Golden Knights figured out how to slow down Collin Sexton, holding the freshman phenom to only seven points — all free throws. If UCF can figure out how to do that, other teams will as well.

Yada Yada Yada

 Mississippi State (7-0)

This week: Beat Dayton (61-59)

The Bulldogs are the only undefeated team in the SEC, but I refuse to move them up until they beat somebody legit. A two-point win over Dayton is fine, but we’ll really see what Ben Howland’s group is made of when they travel to #17 Cincinnati on Tuesday.

Auburn (7-1)

This week: Beat George Mason (79-63) and Gardner-Webb (80-55)

Auburn’s still holding it together despite not having Danjel Purifoy and Austin Wiley (suspended indefinitely over eligibility concerns). With a non-conference slate as soft as Charmin (a home game vs. UConn is not what it once was), they’ll continue to coast until opening SEC play at Tennessee.

Georgia (7-1)

This week: Beat Marquette (73-66) and Winthrop (87-82)

The Bulldogs survived a scare from Winthrop at home, but continue to look like Yante Maten and a bunch of dudes. Maten is averaging almost a double double with 18.5 ppg and 9.4 rpg.

Arkansas (6-2)

This week: Lost at Houston (91-65); Beat Colorado State (92-66)

I was pretty high on Arkansas last week, and they they got steamrolled by Houston. Saturday’s game vs. #14 Minnesota will tell us a lot.

Missouri (7-2)

This week: Beat Miami (OH) (70-51)

The Tigers got off to a rough start vs. Miami (OH), but rallied for a 19-point win. It’s good to see they haven’t flatlined since the news Michael Porter Jr. is probably done for the year.

South Carolina (7-2)

This week: Beat UMass (76-70) and Wyoming (80-64)

Chris Silva continues to lead the way for the Gamecocks, who bounced back this week after getting routed by Temple at the Under Armour Reunion at Madison Square Garden.


Ole Miss (4-3)

This week: Lost to Virginia Tech (83-80 OT)

Ole Miss lost their second straight overtime game on Saturday vs. Virginia Tech, who plays Kentucky next Saturday.

LSU (4-2)

This week: No games

How did LSU manage to get 11 days between games?

Vanderbilt (3-6)

This week: Lost to Kansas State (84-79) and Middle Tennessee (66-63)

A bad start to the season only got worse for the Commodores, who dropped back-to-back games to Kansas State and MTSU — at home! Vandy’s defining characteristic thus far has been their inability to make big plays when the game is close. Life doesn’t get any easier; on Sunday, they play at #16 Arizona State, and they open SEC play on December 30 at #5 Florida.


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