The Funkhouser Guide to Your Wound-Licking Wednesday

[caption id="attachment_145318" align="alignnone" width="500"] (Getty Images)[/caption] Well, that happened. And it wasn't so bad. There was the scrappy comeback bid, James Young's I-can-still-score first half, Alex Poythress's hustle (hustle!), and Julius Randle's this-is-why-my-name-rhymes-with-manhandle second half. But if you're anything like me, you'll need something to do today that doesn't involve braving the smattering of Dirty Bird fans trolling your Facebook timeline or seeing all seventeen(thousand?) turnovers on repeat every time you close your eyes. So here's a list of things you can do on the internet today while the Cats (hopefully) shoot a billion free throws each.   Watch this video of Jennifer Lawrence stepping off the red carpet to comfort a crying child (over and over). We've been over my Jennifer Lawrence-is-awesome bit before. But, seriously, come on. What kind of celebrity moves aside the barrier that's supposed to protect them from crazy, crying fans in order to console a little kid acting like a crazy, crying fan? A Kentucky-bred celebrity, that's what kind. If you need me, I'll just be over here pretending that kid is me at about the 10 minute mark of the first half last night.   Catch up on some new t.v. shows. If you have Hulu Plus or access to any cable On Demand services, you can wash some of last night's taste out of your mouth with episodes of some of this fall's new shows. I'd recommend either Fox's Sleepy Hollow or ABC's Marvel's Agents of SHIELD.  Way back at the beginning of the fall t.v. season, I marveled (no pun intended) at the fact that Sleepy Hollow, despite a ridiculously stupid sounding premise, had a pretty strong first episode. But not only has the show consistently improved over its first eight episodes, but it also has built up a pretty rabid following on the interwebs.  On the other hand, Agents of SHIELD, based in same the Marvel cinematic universe as the popular Iron Man, Thor, Captain America, and Avengers movie franchises, had an intensely engaged audience from the get-go. Not only is it tied to hugely successful movies and comic books, but it is also ran by t.v. demigod Joss Whedon, of Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Firefly fame. The only drawback of creating two of the best shows in television history is that your fans end up expecting everything you do to be just as great from the beginning (sound familiar?). Agents of SHIELD -- like our young, beloved Cats -- got off to a slow start, but has been steadily improving over the course of the season. So, catching up on either of these shows will not only distract you for a while today, but might just also give you some space to think about promise and steady improvement over time.   http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mum7yCzpNWA Watch this Key and Peele Mr. T sketch (also over and over) . . .  I first got into Key and Peele on the strength of their hilarious Obama's Anger Translator skit (NSFW), and enjoyed their strong second season, but they've been seriously killing it in their third season. This Mr. T/1980s public service announcement parody is maybe my favorite bit so far. There's a lot of nuanced hilarity here, but the simple concept of imagining Mr. T as a simultaneously hopelessly authentic and extremely insecure person is what really gets me.   http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7_rBidCkJxo . . . then watch the video it's based on (again, more than once). I'm obviously late to the game on this one, but it's almost too much to handle -- especially since I didn't see it until I had watched the Key and Peele skit about a thousand times. Sometimes reality is even more horribly surreal than fiction. Hang in there, BBN. There are brighter days ahead.