Annoying stuff your spouse/girlfriend/boyfriend does

[Dennis Reynolds]

We haven't had one of these threads in a while, and since Wildcatchad is finally in a real relationship for the first time, want to let him get all his on the board.

I'll start:

My wife is physically incapable of ordering something from a menu. It must, MUST, ALWAYS have 3-10 changes, subtractions, additions, etc. It's unreal.

She also has wine pour paranoia. Meaning whenever we get wine at a restaurant, 100% of the time, the waiter underpours her glass compared to everyone else at the table. It's unreal how this can happen to one person over and over again non-stop. Probably happens because the waiter is pissed at having to make 900 changes to her order.

The dog. I love the dog, but the wife buys this mutt more toys than I had as a child growing up. Every day there is a new Amazon box with something for the dog.

 

[Anon1711055878]

I think the most universal one would be bathroom cleanliness. Ladies, I know you all have a lot more to maintain, but some of yall are disgusting. Hair everywhere [sick]

 

[BankerCat12]

This guy Lewis from her work who has been staying at our house after they have HH with other work friends every weekday night. He's a nice guy and all but get your own house.

 

[UKserialkiller]

I hate how my wife doesn't sneak up on me and fart in my face. What a *****.

 

[jameslee32]

This guy Lewis from her work who has been staying at our house after they have HH with other work friends every weekday night. He's a nice guy and all but get your own house.

WTF? How does this happen?

Best my wife can do is not putting stuff away or where she found it.

 

[Hank Camacho]

She has never heard anything I said the first time.

N-E-V-E-R.

Everything I touching say gets a response of "What?" or "Huh?". I can literally be speaking directly to her and it is like I'm speaking in tongues.

Also, she loves to go upstairs or in another room and ask me some inane question that couldn't possible be worth discussion in the quietest voice possible.

I swear, the word "WHAT?" is the most common word in my household.

 

[funKYcat75]

Most recently ...

Tries to give the three year old complicated directions to find or pick up something instead of just getting up and doing it herself.

Clothes = piles

I'm sure I'll have more.

 

[BBdK]

She has never heard anything I said the first time.

N-E-V-E-R.

Everything I touching say gets a response of "What?" or "Huh?". I can literally be speaking directly to her and it is like I'm speaking in tongues.


I swear, the word "WHAT?" is the most common word in my household.

Try not repeating the question/statement, give her a few seconds, and watch her answer despite acting like she didn't hear or understand you. Saying 'what' is merely a horrible habit for some people.

 

[Hank Camacho]

Try not repeating the question/statement, give her a few seconds, and watch her answer despite acting like she didn't hear or understand you. Saying 'what' is merely a horrible habit for some people.

Done that. Then I'm "mean" and/or "being an *******".

 

[KingOfBBN]

-Leaves cabinet doors open
- Thinks I have to be looking at her in order to hear her
-Gasps or acts shocked any time our kids fall, while I have to constantly remind her that 90 percent of the time the kid awaits for your reaction before they react. My 3-year-old has now been conditioned by me to dust himself off and say "I'm okay. I'm a man." [laughing]

All in all, she's pretty awesome. Probably has more complaints about me.

 

[Hank Camacho]

If there was an app that turned off every single one of the insane number of lights she turned on whenever her vehicle left the driveway, I'd pay $100 right now.

 

[JHB4UK]

never fails, at bedtime for our kids my wife will
1)have to make an urgent run to Target or
2)be on the phone to help her mom or a bestie with a crisis or
3)just have to lay down & turn out lights because her tummy hurts

if I didn't enjoy putting my kids to bed & reading their books it would infuriate me. as it is I treat it as a fun game, trying to guess what excuse or activity she will come up with tonight to get out of it.

 

[ukalumni00]

- Leaves lights on
- Rather messy when it comes to throwing clothes and stuff around the house
- Horrible listener

Guess I wonder who is really the woman in this marriage :joy:

 

[Hank Camacho]

Has a woman ever turned a light off or shut a door/drawer/etc?

Honest question.

 

[TriangleUKCat]

Lately, trying to ask a question/tell me something the moment after I leave the room so I have to return. Happens like 30 times in a row and it is never anything important. Ever.

(gets just outside door)
"HEY BABE?"

 

[Hank Camacho]

Lately, trying to ask a question/tell me something the moment after I leave the room so I have to return. Happens like 30 times in a row and it is never anything important. Ever.

(gets just outside door)
"HEY BABE?"

Drives me insane.

*walk out of the room to mow the yard, or whatever* "Hey babe!?!? Do you think the dog is ok? He doesn't act like he's hungry."

At moments like that, I think "You know, the Incredible Hulk was on to something."

 

[ukalum01]

After watching my wife play on her phone/texting/Facebook/Henterist/etc in the car on the interstate for the last 35 minutes...

Me - "Hey, can you enter this address in the GPS/Hey, can you check your phone for some food options coming up?"

Her - "Yeah but you know how I get motion sickness in the car if I mess around with screens too much."

Five minutes later she's slumped over in her seat , deathly ill, because I'm a jerk and knowingly asked her to glance at the phone she's been snap chatting on for the entire trip.

smh

 

[WonderBraa]

-Can't pack except for 1 am the night before her trip. Leads to her being upset. And if I mention "why didn't you pack earlier?" She's all of a sudden the busiest person in the world and I'm an a$$ for rushing her.

-mumbles...then says it's my hearing

-if I'm upset over something she did, it's my fault and she's mad now.

-Complains about being fat....buys Oreos

-Complains about being fat while eating Oreos.

-Plans a new diet every single day while eating Oreos

-won't stop eating Oreos

 

[Hank Camacho]

After watching my wife play on her phone/texting/Facebook/Henterist/etc in the car on the interstate for the last 35 minutes...

Me - "Hey, can you enter this address in the GPS/Hey, can you check your phone for some food options coming up?"

Her - "Yeah but you know how I get motion sickness in the car if I mess around with screens too much."

Five minutes later she's slumped over in her seat , deathly ill, because I'm a jerk and knowingly asked her to glance at the phone she's been snap chatting on for the entire trip.

smh

My money was on ukalum01 bitching about yankee candles.

 

[bthaunert]

-Complains about being fat....buys Oreos

-Complains about being fat while eating Oreos.

-Plans a new diet every single day while eating Oreos

-won't stop eating Oreos

[roll]

 

[.S&C.]

I like it when I check her vehicle oil.

Sticker says change at 55,000 miles, odometer reads 60,500.

 

[funKYcat75]

I like it when I check her vehicle oil.

Sticker says change at 55,000 miles, odometer reads 60,500.

You can't change your girl's* oil for her?

* I assume

 

[ukalum01]

My money was on ukalum01 bitching about yankee candles.

There should be a 30 for 30 about that whole episode.

 

[KentuckyStout]

Thinks our dog is actually human.

 

[Hank Camacho]

There should be a 30 for 30 about that whole episode.

I agree.

 

[.S&C.]

You can't change your girl's* oil for her?

* I assume

You'd assume correctly.

I could, but then she wins.

 

[TCurtis75_rivals88839]

She never fills up her gas tank. It will be on empty and she will always ask me to go put gas in her car.

Never loads the dishwasher. Leaves the dishes in the sink but then bitches that I am not loading the dishwasher correctly.

I can't really complain. My girl is pretty awesome and will put out anytime I want so I can live with the other stuff.

 

[WettCat]

Breathe.

 

[backbeatcat_rivals376595]

There should be a 30 for 30 about that whole episode.

This. That episode is in the running for best sitcom episode EVER, and yes you touchers I have seen every episode of Seinfeld, Arrested Development, Curb, etc....

"Babe"

 

[Ron Mehico]

Constantly asks me what's going on in a movie and to explain why something is happening although I'm also watching it with her for the first time

If we're watching a show on DVR and I'm fast forwarding through commercials if we miss 2 seconds I have to rewind it back and watch the fade in 2 seconds that contained absolutely nothing

Mumbles all the time and gets mad at me for not hearing her

Absolutely will not give me good directions when I'm driving and will tell me to take a turn or take an exit at the last possible second or just won't even tell me at all although I've been asking her when to turn for the last 5 minutes and she's staring at the GPS the whole time

 

[UKserialkiller]

Breathe.

Exists

 

[.S&C.]

Constantly asks me what's going on in a movie and to explain why something is happening although I'm also watching it with her for the first time

If we're watching a show on DVR and I'm fast forwarding through commercials if we miss 2 seconds I have to rewind it back and watch the fade in 2 seconds that contained absolutely nothing

Mumbles all the time and gets mad at me for not hearing her

Absolutely will not give me good directions when I'm driving and will tell me to take a turn or take an exit at the last possible second or just won't even tell me at all although I've been asking her when to turn for the last 5 minutes and she's staring at the GPS the whole time

Or tells you how to drive from the passenger seat, completing ignoring the fact that she herself is a pitiful driver.

 

[jedwar]

Other than still living:

Always has a better way or always right. No matter the subject, task etc, she has a better way. Even if she doesn't know a thing about it.

 

[JHB4UK]

-Can't pack except for 1 am the night before her trip. Leads to her being upset.

that is so common as to be universal, right? who is in a relationship with a female who does NOT get upset, feel she is having a crisis, & cry while preparing to depart for a trip?

 

[ThwKentuckyKid]

The way she sleeps with all the other homeless guys in tent city.

 

[UKserialkiller]

that is so common as to be universal, right? who is in a relationship with a female who does NOT get upset, feel she is having a crisis, & cry while preparing to depart for a trip?

Bi-polar?

 

[Xception]

Doesn't listen but waits for me to finish talking because what she has to say is more important . There's improvement though , it took me years to teach her not to cut me off while talking .

 

[Anon1640710541]

Biggest issue with the now ex: being a pack rat. I mean, she wouldn't throw ANYTHING away. God forbid I wanted to toss a ratty old pair of underwear....

"....don't toss those out! My dad/cousin/brother/whoever will be in town in 6 months and I'll see if he wants them."

[eyeroll][eyeroll]

In the middle of one of these arguments one time, I accidentally shattered some gd family heirloom snow globe or something. I literally just shut up and immediately left. For hours.

I've never lived with anyone before her, and likely never will again.

 

[jwheat]

When you get done cooking something greasy (beef, sausage, bacon, etc) it's a lot easier to get that **** off the less time you leave it laying on the countertop.

I assume every woman leaves hair in the drain. I can't even be mad about it anymore unless the water is over my ankles before I realize it.

Bitches at me for never washing the dishes because it's "not just the woman's job" will never EVER take out the trash because "the man should do that".

I can handle changing her oil for her unlike some prick earlier, all i ask for is to at least check it and give me a heads up when it's getting to that point.


To be continued

 

[Strokin_Bandit]

She's not a great cook. Anytime she wants to entertain family or hens, I do the food preparation. And it's really a blessing in disguise because I get quality "me" time.

Also, she doesn't really care about sports and has no idea why my mood is affected by them. Helps me keep things in perspective in the long run, but it's caused many quick-tempered arguments in the short term.