Getting Engagement Pressure
- Thread starter liveblue92
- Start date
Everything you said is true. The only trouble is, most divorced people felt that way about their significant other before they got married.
Women marry men thinking they will change - but they don't.
Men marry women thinking they won't change - but they do.
How one's marriage survives depends on how both are able to adapt to this truth.
*Noted: this is a generality.
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When she leave yo ***, she gonna leave with half.
If you give in to her "pressure" it won't end there...you will be "pressured" into kids...on and on...just do what you think is right when you think it's the right time to propose.
One of my good friends was pressured to get engaged for 3 years and he proposed when he was ready and everything turned out just fine.
One of my good friends was pressured to get engaged for 3 years and he proposed when he was ready and everything turned out just fine.
I think most divorced people I know weren't mature enough or intelligent enough to make this assessment when they got married.
Damn that peer pressure.
You never know what someone is like till you live with them.
4, 7, 3, 1, 2, 6, 5....
I need to take a shower now.
If you're having to ask should you get married... then you shouldn't get married. Also, somebody demanding you ask them is a huge red flag. Probably means you are a wimp, she doesn't respect you, and will be banging all your friends before the wedding cake is gone. Do yourself a favor, dump her, move out of state, change your name, wear shirts with frilly sleeves, and speak with an Australian accent. It may not make much sense now, but trust me, if you follow this life plan you will live a fantastic life instead of being chained to that demanding hussy.
Screw that.....that dude should cut his losses now (which is his time), and move on elsewhere. That chick is nothing but trouble.
Meh, don't agree with this at all. As a matter of fact I would say this is why I know all these 40 somethings that are still single and looking for "the one", looking for this unrealistic thing. There's always going to be doubt when there are a million other girls within 15 miles of you. And I didn't feel a spark everytime I saw my girlfriend now wife. I loved her, we got along great, she was a good person, and I was happy. That was it. No dancing on clouds when I saw her, no crying when I was apart from her, no whatever other dramatic hollywood things you think you should feel. That's my opinion anyway.
I mean if the Bachelor can fall in love with two girls and propose to one after a few TV dates, not really sure what's the hold up.
I like Ron's idea. Just settle for whatever you can get. Life is brutal. Best batten down the hatches and settle for the fact that there is another human being willing to share a house with you. Aiming low is the key to happiness. It's all an expectations game anyway. Just marry the first girl that doesn't leave you when you fart in front of her as there isn't much else you can expect. Look at Ron, good God look at Ron. She didn't mind his athletes feet and as long as he could shovel a couple hundred pounds of groceries into the kitchen every week then she was good. Sort of has a "livestock" ring to it but hey, he's... not alone when he's at home. I guess.
does she already have kids? If so, do you want to donations to adopt one of your own. If this is not the case, i apologize. If it is the case, my offer to spend a lovely evening with the two of you so you can have a kid of your own still stands.
That is true. I was married at 19. My wife was barely 18. In hindsight I would never recommend getting married anywhere near that age but that was the norm back then. However my marriage has endured for almost 53 years. Numerous ups and downs of course but those can often be worked through if both believe their wedding vows were made to others as well as to one another (the witnesses present and, oh yes, to God if married in a church).
So you are completely content with your wife, yes? Good. Then you agree with me, even though your comprehension level seems to be pretty low as I said absolutely nothing about dancing on clouds or crying when apart or any other Hollywood ******** you interjected.
I would tend to agree with you that 23 is young to get married, but it depends on the maturity level of the couple (and/or their standards of morality).
Yes, I'm very happy. But I never saw sparks everytime I saw her and I had some doubt about getting married to one girl for the rest of my damn life. If that's what I was waiting for I'd die single. That's just an unrealistic standard in my opinion.
Then that's the only thing that really matters, the rest is mostly opinion. You seem to be taking this "spark" thing personally
.I'm not really advocating for a certain age or level of life experience or success. The main things I have noticed in great marriages regardless of income, age, or whatever is basically a certain level of maturity and intelligence. You have to be mature and intelligent enough to realize you're not perfect and you have faults and that the other person should not be expected to be either. You have to understand you both have hopes and dreams and that supporting them in their pursuits is just as important as them supporting you. Sacrifice, disappointment, and disagreements will happen, it's whether you can reconcile, forgive, and move on from these things that make a long and happy life with your spouse. Obviously maturity and intelligence increase as you get older but I think there are younger folks that are there too. Just depends on the person and their partner.
Great Point. Guys that wait until their 30's are really immature with extremely poor morals.
@wcc31
@Wildcat Willy
@Bonzo Cat
@PTI (pti)
@drxman1
All really immature with poor moral fiber.
Then that's the only thing that really matters, the rest is mostly opinion. You seem to be taking this "spark" thing personally
Ya man, I'm about to completely blow a gasket over here. Was it my typing in all caps or excessive cussing that made me seem like a giant rage ball? Also when I'm really heated I love finishing off my anger posts with "in my opinion", really sets the strong and confrontational tone I'm going for.
Ron expressing a raging disappointment with his life has really been the highlight of this thread. A loveless marriage and an aggressive confrontational internet persona. I don't know how it could end badly.
I guess it makes all of our lives better in knowing that his has failed so utterly.
I guess it makes all of our lives better in knowing that his has failed so utterly.
If she starts pressuring you into marriage, then you start pressuring her into a three-way. Tell her that you need to check some things off your sexual bucket list before you could ever consider settling down.
If you were telling her that with a completely straight face like you were discussing taxes while resting a big giant rubber dong on your shoulder it would be perfect.
Use IMHO instead. It makes the same point but comes across as less aggressive.