How About a Corona Virus Joke Thread?
- Thread starter The-Hack
- Start date
I was cashing my check at the bank today and two men came in wearing masks. We were all relieved when we found out they were just robbing the place.
This is no joke but it is humorous. Our Publix grocery stores have created a "toilet paper" cake. I love Publix Bakery
Don’t worry about the Coronavirus.
Won’t last long.
Made in China.
Won’t last long.
Made in China.
Chuck Norris was exposed to the Corona Virus, yesterday.
The virus is in quarantine for two weeks.
The virus is in quarantine for two weeks.
Sociologists have begun to access the long-term impacts on culture. Some human activities will be permanently altered:
(1) Shaking hands will be very unusual;
(2) Kissing both (or either cheek) in Europe will never return.
(3) Sloppy seconds will be a thing of the past, internationally.
(1) Shaking hands will be very unusual;
(2) Kissing both (or either cheek) in Europe will never return.
(3) Sloppy seconds will be a thing of the past, internationally.
I'm avoiding the coronavirus like it's the plague.
If I'm isolated with her, it looks the same in both pics.
How dare you all have a sense of humor in the face of end days. Racists - the lot of you.
If I’m not allowed to call it the ‘Kung Flu’ (or whatever the hell else I want to call it) because RACIST!!1!!!!!1, then go ahead and take me out. Done with this ride.
If I’m not allowed to call it the ‘Kung Flu’ (or whatever the hell else I want to call it) because RACIST!!1!!!!!1, then go ahead and take me out. Done with this ride.
Toilet paper shortage hits rural Kentucky:
Went into Walgreens yesterday and a saw guy with a cart filled with hand sanitizer. I told him that he should be ashamed of himself and to stop hoarding. He said "If you are done, let me get back to work".
Coronavirus? The last thing to spread this fast was your Mom's legs.
When you leave a man home alone with puppets.
A reasonable mistake.
A suspected Covid-19 male patient is lying in bed in the hospital, wearing an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose. A young student female nurse appears and gives him a partial sponge bath.
"Nurse,"' he mumbles from behind the mask, "are my testicles black?"
Embarrassed, the young nurse replies, "I don't know, Sir. I'm only here to wash your upper body and feet."
He struggles to ask again, "Nurse, please check for me. Are my testicles black?"
Concerned that he might elevate his blood pressure and heart rate from worrying about his testicles, she overcomes her embarrassment and
pulls back the covers.
She raises his gown, holds his manhood in one hand and his testicles gently in the other.
She looks very closely and says, "There's nothing wrong with them, Sir. They look fine."
The man slowly pulls off his oxygen mask, smiles at her, and says very slowly,
"Thank you very much. That was wonderful. Now listen very,
very, closely:
"Are - my - test - results - back?"
A suspected Covid-19 male patient is lying in bed in the hospital, wearing an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose. A young student female nurse appears and gives him a partial sponge bath.
"Nurse,"' he mumbles from behind the mask, "are my testicles black?"
Embarrassed, the young nurse replies, "I don't know, Sir. I'm only here to wash your upper body and feet."
He struggles to ask again, "Nurse, please check for me. Are my testicles black?"
Concerned that he might elevate his blood pressure and heart rate from worrying about his testicles, she overcomes her embarrassment and
pulls back the covers.
She raises his gown, holds his manhood in one hand and his testicles gently in the other.
She looks very closely and says, "There's nothing wrong with them, Sir. They look fine."
The man slowly pulls off his oxygen mask, smiles at her, and says very slowly,
"Thank you very much. That was wonderful. Now listen very,
very, closely:
"Are - my - test - results - back?"
News anchor working at home, atleast he wasn't walking though in tighty whities scratching his butt.
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We need to look at the bright side of things. My sister was complaining about her employer closing during this. I told her she didn't have it all that bad, at least she was only losing 79 cents for every dollar the men were losing.
That's a good laugh, while waiting for Wal-mart to email my order in complete already.