I understand your thought process there and am down with much of your analysis. I am certainly no fan of political correctness and the trophies for all crap has been a disaster for society. Also, I have no issue with using colorful language every now and then when appropriate and calling out those who are not being "manly'...yet, you can do it respectfully in a way that players know you care.
The intent about the winning some games comment was how the kids and parents may interpret the reward of only brutal hard work.
As I stated, make changes to incorporate today's softer mentalities into the sports culture, and then the will players buy into more old school methods.
To UVAcavs. Agree with 100% of what you just wrote. Again, I kind of agreed with 100% of your previous post and I should have clarified that more. You hinted or jested as the way things are today and that it is what it is. At least, that was my interpretation. I agree with you. I will even take it a step further and say there is no turning back.
To WPO2alum. I disagree with most of your post and agree with some. I respect all of it. As for agreeing. Coaches can be effective in developing mental toughness and perseverance without cussing. My argument is...…......the "attempt" at assuring or attempting to enforce to the coaches that do cuss is equally or more harmful. Again, I suspect you feel different and respect that. We simply disagree. Additionally, cussing in my opinion, is FAR FROM the only tool at developing toughness and perseverance as I clearly eluded to. It's simply one of the tools. Now, as for the major disagreements....
1. I never "ranted"<-----your description of my opinion about the kids. The overwhelming majority of my post focused on the parents as the issue, not the kids. That's clearly eluded from the post.
2. You used the words, "self-reflection." Again, we have a fundamental disagreement. I kind of hinted at that in the post as part of the problem. "SELF" is part of the problem.
3. You wrote that the best programs change every year. That's partially true. Fact is, ALL programs change every year, both the poor programs and the great programs. Your focus of the word "change" is vague. Change is a vague term. Define it? Change can be good and bad or somewhere in between. But, when we think of the word "change" as automatically being good (and in our society, that's the initial prevailing thought by most) we are forming a conclusion based on emotion and not fact or data. Again, ALL programs "change" every year, both good and bad.
4. You wrote that at some point, "the kids stop buying in" with an exclamation for emphasis. Again, where we fundamentally disagree is...…………...the adults control the buying in part, not the kids, and for coaches to get kids to "buy in," the secret may actually be in the form of tough love, but caring. In summary, true innovation. But, chomping and temporally hurting a kids self-esteem is not to be defined as non-innovative. In today's time, it would be VERY innovative, whether that be cursing, yelling, screaming, etc. But the key addition is, showing care and having the kids understood and know that you truly do care.
5. You wrote that, "The older people get, the more they bristle at change, and that you see a lot of that in my post." For starters, I'm a neuroscientist P.h.D. in my early 40s. My occupation is one centered on finding a cure for ALS that encompasses about 60 hours of my week. It's the essential of embracing change. Therefore, I'm sorry you interpreted my age as one "you see in my post." Facts are......the studies show that the older you get, you are actually FAR more likely to embrace change and be able to cope with change in more meaningful situations. I've authored one and will quote it if you wish. I know, CNN, FOX, and Hollywood doesn't tell us that, but the data shows as primates age, they are more able to adapt to change and accept change. Again, you haven't defined "change." It sounds to me you have echoed this word after hearing it in numerous media and TV outlets without actually giving great thought as to what "change" means. It's an incredibly vague word. The assumption that "change is great" has ZERO data to support it. Change can be horrific. It can be wonderful. It can be somewhere in between. Venezuela used to have democracy, then it "changed" to a strict from of socialistic-dictatorship. Today, it's bankrupt with murder rates approaching the highest for any country. Was that "change" good? Did the older people in Venezuela "fail to embrace it?" LOL. Jonas Salk was told to give up on a Polio Vaccine after tons of monetary funding and failures. He was told "change" was not worth it. Well, he continued to change and was it worth it? Of course it was. My point is, change can be in many forms, but it's unfair to hijack change as only a form of "good" that agrees with your viewpoint. The inverse is also true.
6. You wrote that the thread or theme was on getting kids to buy in. That's not totally true, but partially true. The thread took that direction. What I'm saying is (in my opinion) that getting kids to buy in is actually FAR from what your reality or perception is. Jim Harbaugh-incredibly tough, old school, cusses like a Sailor, but innovative. Dabbo-a devout Christian and not a guy that curses, but incredibly tough. Bud Foster? I've been on the sidelines a time or two and in practice more than a couple of scores of times. He has a vicious profane language style, but at the same time, he's going to tell the kid he loves them and asks how their parents are doing. It's this right here.....this is the innovation and tough love that helps kids (again, in my opinion only) in the long run. This is where Dabbo and Jim Harbaugh or Bud Foster excel. They are tough, but caring. They will quickly show you that "Self" is not the primary focus. The primary focus is "not-self." That's the innovative part and where I agree 100% with UVA Cavs.
In conclusion and centered on getting kids to buy in to finish my post, I write the following. You can do that by being innovative. You can do that by being incredibly tough. The energy exerted in the enforcement of being politically correct leaves little in the category of caring for others. So, in order to get kids to buy in, you enforce rules and show a strong hand in discipline, and with the other 50%, you show caring and love. A family friend of mine is Mike Smith: legendary Hampton Coach. Mike chewed a kid out one day in practice on a Monday (yes, in the form of cursing and maybe borderline abuse in 2018 standards) and beat the kid home after practice and was already talking with his mother when he arrived in the door. The kid took the bus. After all was said and done, the kid had one pair of blue-jeans to wear to school. 2 days later, that kid had 4 more pair including 4 more shirts and his name was Almondo Curry. That's a true story. It's exactly what I'm talking about. Almondo got absolutely blasted one day in practice. His "self-esteem" was crushed. His "self-esteem" was rightfully and deservingly crushed on the practice field. Over the next 96 hours, an incredible amount of true love and caring was demonstrated on behalf of Mike Smith not from the blue jeans and 4 shirts, but from the additional "as$" chewing that occurred 3 days after the purchasing of clothes. You see, Muffin Curry skipped his 4th period of class on Friday, the day of the football game against rival Kecoughtan, and he was allowed to set the bench and not play for the entire game. His mother thanked Mike Smith for that. Today, "Muffin" is doing just fine and so are his kids. This is kind of what I'm getting at.
