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<blockquote data-quote="The Bell Tolls for Thee" data-source="post: 132442400" data-attributes="member: 1812660"><p>They only failed him if they didn't suggest he get help.&nbsp; The unfortunate truth is that no addict can be forced into anything.&nbsp; Forcing people into rehab or those voluntarily going only to avoid a consequence such as jail fail EVERY time.&nbsp; The harsh truth that is so hard for family and friends is you cannot want it for them.&nbsp; Nor should you let their behavior torpedo your life/career if they are unwilling to change.&nbsp; Sometimes all you can do is sever ties and hope that is enough of a kick in the pants to motivate them.&nbsp; But if it is not, it is still not your fault that they chose the self destructive path.&nbsp; Too many family and friends feel unearned guilt because they think they abandoned them when all they did was stop enabling and allowing another's addiction to poison their lives.&nbsp; It's like saving a drowning person.&nbsp; You can offer assistance, but if they refuse to even try to swim with you, you either both will slowly drown or you have to pit yourself at a safe distance until they are ready to try.</p></blockquote><p></p>

[QUOTE="The Bell Tolls for Thee, post: 132442400, member: 1812660"] They only failed him if they didn't suggest he get help. The unfortunate truth is that no addict can be forced into anything. Forcing people into rehab or those voluntarily going only to avoid a consequence such as jail fail EVERY time. The harsh truth that is so hard for family and friends is you cannot want it for them. Nor should you let their behavior torpedo your life/career if they are unwilling to change. Sometimes all you can do is sever ties and hope that is enough of a kick in the pants to motivate them. But if it is not, it is still not your fault that they chose the self destructive path. Too many family and friends feel unearned guilt because they think they abandoned them when all they did was stop enabling and allowing another's addiction to poison their lives. It's like saving a drowning person. You can offer assistance, but if they refuse to even try to swim with you, you either both will slowly drown or you have to pit yourself at a safe distance until they are ready to try. [/QUOTE]

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