Hang in there Willy. It was good to hear your voice yesterday. Austin spoke highly of your wife. Sounds like it is worth trying to stay together.
N.O.B.
- Thread starter mashburned
- Start date
I've never been divorced, but I know plenty of people that have been. It seems to me that if people would put the same effort into their marriage the same as what gets put into divorce, then there would be fewer divorces.
Maybe I'm wrong though and some things can't be made right.
Maybe I'm wrong though and some things can't be made right.
Sometimes wisdom is forced upon us due to our decisions--but I hope she sees you're a new man, Willy
For the most part I agree, but there are some couples that are just meant for divorce. My cousin has been married to his wife for going on thirty years, and they should have divorced years ago. Both of them are miserable, and the only reason a divorce hasn't happened is because they are "Christian", and that they are staying together for the kids. Yeah, I'm sure the kids would much rather grow up in a home where they hear fighting every night than splitting time with mom and dad.
Thanks guys. I think anyone wishes for a 2nd chance if given an opportunity
Well, ma'am, I don't know much, but I do know human beings. You brought back my boy, so you must have your good points, too. I sure hate to think of Florence leaving me. I do love her so. You can go out the way you came in. Oh, and before you do another foolish thing like busting up, I suggest you sleep on it. At least for one night.
This is my dream for you brother:
That night I had a dream. I dreamt I was as light as the ether- a floating spirit visiting things to come. The shades and shadows of the people in my life rassled their way their way into my slumber. I dreamed that Gale and Evelle had decided to return to prison. Probably that's just as well. I don't mean to sound superior, and they're a swell couple of guys, but maybe they weren't ready yet to come out into the world. And then I dreamed on, into the future, to a Christmas morn in the Arizona home where Nathan Junior was opening a present from a kindly couple who preferred to remain unknown. I saw Glen a few years later, still having no luck getting the cops to listen to his wild tales about me and Ed. Maybe he threw in one Polack joke too many. I don't know. And still I dreamed on, further into the future than I had ever dreamed before, watching Nathan Junior's progress from afar, taking pride in his accomplishments as if he were our own. Wondering if he ever thought of us and hoping that maybe we'd broadened his horizons a little even if he couldn't remember just how they got broadened. But still I hadn't dreamt nothing about me and Ed until the end. And this was cloudier cause it was years, years away. But I saw an old couple being visited by their children, and all their grandchildren too. The old couple weren't screwed up. And neither were their kids or their grandkids. And I don't know. You tell me. This whole dream, was it wishful thinking? Was I just fleeing reality like I know I'm liable to do? But me and Ed, we can be good too. And it seemed real. It seemed like us and it seemed like, well, our home. If not Arizona, then a land not too far away. Where all parents are strong and wise and capable and all children are happy and beloved. I don't know. Maybe it was Utah.
Young and dumb. They were high school lovers and once they started living with each other, realized they weren't the couple they thought they were. A lot of couples go through that, after the marriage you find out the person you thought you were hitching isn't the person you are currently with.
I DON'T KNOW, THEY WERE JAMMIES -- THEY HAD YODAS 'N **** ON 'EM !
I don't necessarily think Diallo leaving "is a joke"…because if the kid can go lotto then he should go. Or maybe even if he is a high 1st rounder he should go (i think he is currently projected as a 2nd rounder though but i could be mistaken about that). As a UK fan, I don't like the potential of him leaving…but i wouldn't blame him for going if he were a lotto pick.
And i don't blame Cal for recruiting him…even if he leaves without playing a minute at UK. He was a top recruit that everyone wanted. This was the avenue available to land him and we had a scholly available. So take a shot. At worst he leaves early but he helped make us a better team last year by having a really good player to practice against for half the season. At best, he helped us in practice last season for half the year and he stays and plays next season.
Here's the part I don't understand at all though...
But i do agree 100% with kooky that he should of played for the Cats last season. If he was playing as good in practice as everyone says he was…and he was an eligible player…then play him. Why would you not? Makes no sense to me at all. Especially the way Cal currently assembles teams and the system he uses. A halfway decent 8th grade player could pick up on Cal's offense in a week or two. Not like it is complicated. And we play man to man switch everything on defense. Most 4th grade players learned how to play defense like that in the 2nd grade. So nothing complicated there either. And we have no out of bounds plays (just post up and get the ball in bounds or throw it way out front to the guard)…so aside from being confused about that fact…nothing complicated to learn there. So easy peasy.
And i think he should have been playing even earlier than kooky is saying. I would have had him playing spot minutes during the last few games of reg season (maybe even sooner)…maybe even bumping those minutes up in the reg season depending on his production and how he gelled with the team. Then, if he produced at a high rate, i would have been playing him quality minutes in the SEC tourney and NCAA tourney.
You don't lose anything by throwing him in there and trying it out. So you burn a year of eligibility. So what? Kid isn't staying after next season anyway. And if he doesn't gel with the team or if he performs poorly then quit playing him.
Thanks. I know you knew I was making a mistake and I was.
I just ended it with the other girl. That may still not bring my wife back to me, but at least I did the right thing.
I am thankful that you all have been supportive. Now, let's see if time will heal this. Yesterday, I even prayed to God. Something I haven't done since I was a teenager. Will that prayer work? I'm not sure. If there is a Big Guy in the Sky, he may see that I'm too broken to help. We'll see....
You have to target the weak spots in her armor man. You said a couple weeks ago she gave you some ultimatums. So she either legitimately was entertaining taking you back or she's doing it just to hurt you, which would be an understandable natural reaction given the events.
I guess my point is, hammer on those things. Show her you're doing everything she needs you to do. Get sentimental with it...remind her of the good times you guys had together and get creative doing so. Be eternally contrite. All things I am sure you're already doing.
Hate that you have to go through this man, sucks tremendously. Just have to keep fighting and be patient.
I guess my point is, hammer on those things. Show her you're doing everything she needs you to do. Get sentimental with it...remind her of the good times you guys had together and get creative doing so. Be eternally contrite. All things I am sure you're already doing.
Hate that you have to go through this man, sucks tremendously. Just have to keep fighting and be patient.
Bro. I took a video this morning at 5 a.m of me pouring beer down the toilet and then a half ounce of pot and flushed it. Problem is, I'm not sure there are any weak spots in her armor. I sent her a thing of flowers. Let her know that I broke it off with the other person.
Yeah, I should have known this was gonna happen when my warning signs were going off like a air raid bombing.
Would she be open to councilling? Do a couple sessions at least?
She is in individual therapy now. Of course therapist is basically suggesting to get rid of me. At least that's what I am thinking.
I'm not sure couple's therapy is gonna work until she gets over her initial anger
You should use your super therapy skills on her and make her ultimately feel bad for causing you to stray in the first place.
I have never been through this, but I would guess that it will take her some time to get over being angry and hurt. I think all of this goes beyond the physical attraction and physical relationship with the other woman. What has been damaged is trust. Trust will not be won by sending flowers or videos of things that you think she wants to see (although those things don't hurt).
I hate to say it, but it might take a long time and may never happen. I think it is worth trying though.
I think that you should eventually write a letter. It may be something that you never send, but I think it will help you to clarify your thoughts. Also, in your interactions with her, I think you should avoid the use of words and phrases that she knows you use as a counselor. She may see it as you trying to manipulate her.
My guess is that both of you are still in a pretty highly charged emotional state right now. As a first step, maybe you can both agree on not making permanent decisions for a few months.
I understand completely...but for the half bag, we must pay respects. RIP in peace 
[laughing]I understand completely...but for the half bag, we must pay respects. RIP in peace
I've always felt that, if I could have one super-power, it wouldn't be invisibility -- it would be the ability to Jedi-mind fv#k someone into questioning their own sanity whenever I felt like it, just 'cause I'm a bastard.
Nah, screw Jedi ****, give me invisibility any day because B( o )( o )BS. Seriously though, how great would it be to see any boob you wanted? It'd be really great, that's how great it would be. YWIA.
Thanks Willy. Things will get better. You will get through this.
Do you still have to have a job if you're invisible? Cause I'd need money for travel.
Heck no 'cause you could rob any store, even banks, you wanted and all they'd see is a bag of money floating away. Plus you could fly anywhere you wanted as long as you could avoid bumping into people on the plane. Invisibility would have a lot of advantages.
Mr. Willy, did no one try and tell you this situation would be a bad idea... either on this board or in real life?
The whole thing blows.
The whole thing blows.
Damnit, willy! I was having a great…no it was fantastical…I was having a FANTASTICAL day until you started posting about all of your woes and casting a huge shadow over the NOB. Now my day has been completely ruined. So you can add that to your list, man. Thanks.
Hahahahaha. Just kidding, man. Like i told you before…vent all you want here. It always helps to vent. Speaking of which...93 might be on to something with that letter business. Even if you never send it.
I hear you tho man. The hard reality is she might come around on it and she might not. Have to prepare for both scenarios simultaneously.
Either way, you'll be fine my dude. You just pulled a very nice dime piece and will certainly be able to do it again if necessary. You have the mojo. If the wife doesn't come around on it, it's for the best. You have to remember there were reasons you did this to begin with. After the fact, you might feel like you were wrong...but you have to continue to explore that internally. What if she takes you back but is awful to you? If you had your way, would you put things back together exactly as they were, like nothing happened, or would you change some things about your marriage?
Let's call it a mid life crisis. (You should use that term with your wife as well honestly, it's relatable) Everybody goes through things like that at different stages in their lives as you know. Some people buy cars or other toys, you slammed a hot chick while in a very emotionally confused state of mind. It was a perfect storm of eager ***** and perplexion, so to speak. Perplexion may or may not be a word.
You have my email....reach out at anytime. You have an infinitely strong support system here on the Paw and outside, always remember that.
Either way, you'll be fine my dude. You just pulled a very nice dime piece and will certainly be able to do it again if necessary. You have the mojo. If the wife doesn't come around on it, it's for the best. You have to remember there were reasons you did this to begin with. After the fact, you might feel like you were wrong...but you have to continue to explore that internally. What if she takes you back but is awful to you? If you had your way, would you put things back together exactly as they were, like nothing happened, or would you change some things about your marriage?
Let's call it a mid life crisis. (You should use that term with your wife as well honestly, it's relatable) Everybody goes through things like that at different stages in their lives as you know. Some people buy cars or other toys, you slammed a hot chick while in a very emotionally confused state of mind. It was a perfect storm of eager ***** and perplexion, so to speak. Perplexion may or may not be a word.
You have my email....reach out at anytime. You have an infinitely strong support system here on the Paw and outside, always remember that.
Zardoz-Sent back
Ol Col. Angus- I know I know I know. Total clouded judgment. Must have been the vegetarianism I was going through.
KS- Thanks- I'll ease up on the venting as time moves on. I will still drop my woe be gones. But as I move to a better place it feels good knowing I can vent here.
Argubs- Thanks man- You've been dropping some powerful words. Makes me think and gives me perceptions. Yeah in the end I will prolly end up with a better person than my wife. Prolly will. JUst spent so long with my wife that I feel like it's wasted. Just absolutely wasted. Ughh that's what hurts. I am going to see what happens after this 30 days. If I have to move on, I'm gonna bang everything in sight. May have too so I can get a good feeling about myself hahaha
Ol Col. Angus- I know I know I know. Total clouded judgment. Must have been the vegetarianism I was going through.
KS- Thanks- I'll ease up on the venting as time moves on. I will still drop my woe be gones. But as I move to a better place it feels good knowing I can vent here.
Argubs- Thanks man- You've been dropping some powerful words. Makes me think and gives me perceptions. Yeah in the end I will prolly end up with a better person than my wife. Prolly will. JUst spent so long with my wife that I feel like it's wasted. Just absolutely wasted. Ughh that's what hurts. I am going to see what happens after this 30 days. If I have to move on, I'm gonna bang everything in sight. May have too so I can get a good feeling about myself hahaha
i suck at giving advice, like real advice, not snarky ******** humor, so i won't even try. obviously have never met any of you, but you all seem like good peoples. hang in there Wily. life is a roller coaster ride. just keep riding man.
Willy, dude, I don't know you from Adam and we probably don't have a whole lot in common, but I like your sense of humor and hope everything works out for you. I know that won't ever show up on a Hallmark card, but I genuinely like you and hope things turn around.