N.O.B.

[AustinTXCat]

:cheers2::fistbump:
I'm really honored that you drove all that way to have a few beers with me. I think I might get some more of that Yard Sale IPA.

I see you're gonna hunt some more golf balls. Didn't you say you have 2 or 3 totes full of them? - strategically placed to fall on your wife's head?

Thanks, man. I really wanted to finally get out and visit. I finally got back to my aunt's place in Bellevue around 6:30 PM that day. We had originally planned on going back to Cascio's in Omaha, but she's 85 years young and wasn't up to it. She first dined at Casio's in 1962. Any way, we sat up for a long time and discussed life. This trip was awesome. Still loving the memories.

 

[AustinTXCat]

Another takeaway: Kum & Go in Coralville. Dude! Craft beer growlers at a GD convenience store!!!!!!!!!

It absolutely floored me! Within 10 minutes after I left you, I snapped this pic. I'm still floored. True story.

 

[UKGrad93]

Gotta say this: I was so impressed with how squeaky clean and green Nebraska and Iowa is. Dude! I could not find any trash at all any where I went. Not like Texas. Heck, this whole damn state is trashed compared to Nebraska/Iowa.

I've heard that Iowa is clean because of the bottle bill. Nickel deposit on bottles and cans. The redemption centers at the grocery stores are nasty though.

 

[AustinTXCat]

Ha ha, my cousin in Bellevue is texting me now. So freaking awesome.

 

[AustinTXCat]

I've heard that Iowa is clean because of the bottle bill. Nickel deposit on bottles and cans. The redemption centers at the grocery stores are nasty though.

Sounds like an awesome hustle during next road trip. Hell, I'll rent a car and haul the empty cans up there.

 

[UKserialkiller]

KS- thanks for taking the time to share that. Means a lot. And sharing the personal side too. I think i will shave my chest today. Go start running and may hit the pool for some vitamin D.

Not getting a pet till outta this piss hole tho. Maybe when i get back to orlando this summer. Great idea. Been wanting a dog for awhile the wife never wanted one. Hmmmm

 

[UKserialkiller]

93- you know where that lunch lady lives? If you do we can go egg her house

 

[Captain Forehead]

Ha. Haven't egged a house since I was 16. That was fun. ***** that rode the bus was just asking for it. Late at night we quietly walked up to the front of her house. Splattered eggs all over it and ran like hell. Was wearing boots. Sounded like cows running and hyenas laughing. Good times.

 

[UKserialkiller]

Ha ha ha ha

 

[ukwildcat2004]

93- you know where that lunch lady lives? If you do we can go egg her house

Is that code for lick her butt hole?

 

[UKGrad93]

Sounds like an awesome hustle during next road trip. Hell, I'll rent a car and haul the empty cans up there.

Not enough profit in that. We need to commandeer a mail truck and haul the cans to Michigan where the deposit is 10 cents.

 

[funKYcat75]

Not enough profit in that. We need to commandeer a mail truck and haul the cans to Michigan where the deposit is 10 cents.

Yeah. Don't do that.

https://www.usnews.com/news/best-st...leads-guilty-in-scam-to-illegally-return-cans

 

[Kaizer Sosay]

Not enough profit in that. We need to commandeer a mail truck and haul the cans to Michigan where the deposit is 10 cents.

Sounds like a plan hatched by Kramerica Industries.

 

[UKGrad93]

Yeah. Don't do that.

https://www.usnews.com/news/best-st...leads-guilty-in-scam-to-illegally-return-cans

It didn't work out for Kramer and Newman either.

 

[mashburned]

KS is right but don't play beach volleyball, Willy.

I like walking, hiking, and exploring with my dog. It's fun.

Growing stuff is cool. You can grow some legal plants. Or hell maybe poppies, make your own heroin? Jk...but seriously, if you grew poppies nobody would know. They look real pretty. USA repealed a "no poppy" law in 1970. The opium poppy is 10% morphine.

ATX, your covert golf ball mission had me dying last night :joy:

 

[UKserialkiller]

Mash, maybe i grow my ow carfentanayl too.

UKw-def butthole lickin code

 

[UKGrad93]

You need a hobby, man. Something besides smoking weed. Preferably something outside. Golf? Fishing? Beach volleyball? Jogging? Which leads me to the other thing you need to do…exercise. Nothing better for you when you are feeling down then a good workout of some sort. Clears the mind. Relieves stress. Gives you a feeling of accomplishment. And it gets you out of the house.

Me personally…I hate to jog/run. Hate it. Always have. I run with my daughter occasionally because she loves it and i love her. And i like running with her because we talk while we run…but i still hate the actual running part. But i love sports. Basketball does the trick for me. Great stress reliever and head clearer for me. Always has been. So i still play…as often as i can. I also golf occasionally. And i walk my mutt on a 3 mile cross country trail close to my house. I also fish in our pond on occasion. But that gets boring unless my kids are with me…because the fish are too easy to catch in my stocked pond. Might as well be a barrel o' fish. But it fun to watch my kids haul them in.

At any rate…all of these things help me forget for a bit about all of the other crazy stuff going on in my life. Sure…those crazy things are still there in the background waiting for me…and they need to be dealt with accordingly...but i don't let them dominate my entire life. I'd go batish crazy if i did.

Here's another thing i recommend...do one of these two things:

(1) Get a pet.
(2) Do some traveling. Doesn't have to be to exotic places and it doesn't have to be expensive. Day trips. Weekend trips. Whatever. Go see a friend you haven't seen in a long time (just don't grind yo' feet on his couch.) Go to the beach. Play some beach volleyball. It's fun and there are always hot chicks around a beach volleyball court.

Do both 1 & 2 unless you plan on traveling extensively…which rules out getting a pet.

Just. Do. Something. GTFO of yo' crib, man.

So you're say Willy needs to join an industrial league basketball team and keep his own stats.

 

[mashburned]

Lmao

I think trivia is cool. Like what world champion trivia master Mav does.

 

[Kaizer Sosay]

Sounds like a plan hatched by Kramerica Industries.

Seeing that post by kooky earlier made me wonder HTF he quoted his own post. So i decided to try it. And it worked! I thought kooky had summoned the dark forces and offered up a fancy gourmet feast as a sacrifice in exchange for the ability to perform some sort of interwebz catpaws wizardry. How long has this been an ordinary option for the masses?

Also, regardless of the answer to the aforementioned question, I would like to take this time to announce that i will no longer quote any posts originated by any other posters. I shall instead randomly quote my own posts in order to reply to someone else's post.


#trendsetter



@Mashburned Why no beach volleyball?

 

[mashburned]

Idk seems European. Only sand sport I recognize is bocce ball.

 

[_Zardoz_]

Idk seems European. Only sand sport I recognize is bocce ball.

True fact: the "sport" of bocce ball was actually invented by current San Francisco Giant's manager Bruce Bochy, while he was thinking of ways to exercise during an ACL rehab years ago.

Note: Bochy altered the spelling because in most of Europe, "bochy" translates to "penis."

 

[ukwildcat2004]

Mash, maybe i grow my ow carfentanayl too.

UKw-def butthole lickin code

When does willy lick butt hole? Days that end "Y"

 

[UKserialkiller]

When does willy lick butt hole? Days that end "Y"

Taking a temporary haitus from ticklin or lickin. May have to get on Tindr.

 

[AustinTXCat]

KS- thanks for taking the time to share that. Means a lot. And sharing the personal side too. I think i will shave my chest today. Go start running and may hit the pool for some vitamin D.

Not getting a pet till outta this piss hole tho. Maybe when i get back to orlando this summer. Great idea. Been wanting a dog for awhile the wife never wanted one. Hmmmm

Where ya staying right now, bro?

 

[ukwildcat2004]

Taking a temporary haitus from ticklin or lickin. May have to get on Tindr.

Swipe right for butt hole?

 

[UKserialkiller]

Where ya staying right now, bro?

Over in Brandon/Riverview area. Near Tampa.
I've already contacted my realtor friend. I'm going back to orlando by July. I have a contact that may be able to get me a ind. contracting gig. Pretty nice money. I've been applying to a few places. Hospices.

 

[mashburned]

Doggy goes to the vet tomorrow and I just got an email telling me to bring a fresh stool sample - 2 hours or less fresh. Cmon. She doesn't even crap within 2 hours of this appointment. They've never asked me to do this before. Maybe they're just trying to get more money from me? Idk. Might just take them my **** lmao. That would be funny.

 

[UKserialkiller]

Ha ha ha

Vet: "Mash, I'm sorry you tell you this, but your dog is eating too much Blue Bell"

 

[mashburned]

These listeria readings are off the charts. I can't believe your dog is still alive.

 

[Kaizer Sosay]

True fact: the "sport" of bocce ball was actually invented by current San Francisco Giant's manager Bruce Bochy, while he was thinking of ways to exercise during an ACL rehab years ago.

Note: Bochy altered the spelling because in most of Europe, "bochy" translates to "penis."

[laughing]

 

[Kooky Kats]

Cazzo, actually.

Spoiler: Stick it

 

[ukwildcat2004]

I mowed the yard and now I'm drinking a beer.

 

[Kooky Kats]

Just got done eating 1/2 dozen clams on the half shell.

Perfection.

 

[TriangleUKCat]

Doggy goes to the vet tomorrow and I just got an email telling me to bring a fresh stool sample - 2 hours or less fresh. Cmon. She doesn't even crap within 2 hours of this appointment. They've never asked me to do this before. Maybe they're just trying to get more money from me? Idk. Might just take them my **** lmao. That would be funny.

Hey there, Unvalued Customer, get your dog on a regimented shitting routine before tomorrow's visit. Make sure she understands to hold her **** in until 2 hours before her appointment time, k? All dogs should be able to negate years of non-habit shitting to bend to our poop preference we just informed you about less than 24 hours before your visit. Thanks!

 

[mashburned]

True.

It's actually on Monday. Lost track of a lot of time today. Lovely day.

I understand the vet, I want them to analyze my dogs crap, like a fine glass of wine, to determine if she's got any issues. I didn't schedule a poop analysis, I signed up for the annual heartworm treatment.

They could also just ask me what her poops like. It's very normal, I see it often. Nice, regulation size turds. Good dark color. She's a two squatter - squats, craps, walks forward 2 steps, craps a smaller turd, then scratches like the earth like a heathen to let all the other animals know "This is my crap!! Sniff it!!".

Sailing away with Capt. Jerry. My damn Samsung freezer needs to pick up the ice production. Why would anyone buy a fn Samsung appliance and when did they even start making appliances?

 

[mashburned]

Just got done eating 1/2 dozen clams on the half shell.

Perfection.

What do clams taste like?

 

[_Zardoz_]

Chicken.

 

[Kooky Kats]

What do clams taste like?

Honestly, they taste like the ocean. Salty, Briney, Sweet, more stable meatiness than oysters.

Icey cold, squeeze of lemon, cocktail sauce. Beer.

 

[_Zardoz_]

Mash, I just feasted on a big bowl of Blue Bell Home Made Vanilla, and it was incredible.

 

[_Zardoz_]

Kook, you'd be proud of me. Wifey and I were watching one of the crime shows, and the perp was wearing a Yankees throwback jersey #23. Wifey asked who's number that was and I instinctively said, "Donnie Ballgame's."

Of course, for a second she thought his last name really was "Ballgame" haha, and when I told her it was actually "Mattingly," she thought I was being a smartass [laughing].