Teams are looking at scary low numbers this year.
- Mothers would rather their sons sit in the rec room and watch "I Am Cait" than play football.
- A study by the Sherlock Institute says if you play a violent sport for 25 years, you may suffer adverse effects from repeated rough play.
- A new sport is rapidly growing, offering parents who've never played instant expertise.
- If you let your son play football, he's almost certain to beat up his woman in a casino in a few years.
- If you can't win a state championship, what's the point of even playing?
- Video games.
- New app.
- Somebody might knock me down. And a coach might raise his voice to me. And I don't want to lose any self-esteem.
- Oh, I'm a huge football fan. NFL, NCAA, Big10, fantasy leagues ... you mean actually play? Ewww gross.
- Because it was terribly important to my coach that we win the conference freshman and soph championships ... I sat on the bench. Now I have a better view from the stands.