OT Kids and sports; how much is too much?

[Maroonthirteen]

Anyone of you with kids playing sports knows that today, kids are playing baseball, basketball, soccer year around. Football isn’t quite as bad but…. There are tournament teams, summer teams, and 2[SUP]nd[/SUP] teams and most kids play for them all. Also, there is a movement now to form regional “tournament” teams….beyond and better than local tournament teams. I know of kids traveling 25-90 miles to practice and play with teams that are chosen teams for the purpose of being able to compete with any team in any tournament in the entire Southeast.

So, your little Johnny (10-12 years old) is very good at his particular sport. He plays on a local tournament team with kids from around town and they play in a later summer league team. Now, his coach wants to form another team with kids from all the surrounding towns chosing only the best from your local team. For the purpose of going to tournaments in Florida, North Carolina, Georgia, Missouri and so on and competing at a higher level against the best from those states. Lets say little Johnny practices 4 days a week 10 months of the year. Plays in numerous tournaments during the spring and summer. Plays in another countless number of single games during a weeknight over the year. Now a few dads, say “hey, our future MLBers can’t get behind during this time off.” So the dads form winter workouts. At what point does a parent say enough is enough? Even if the kid loves it and wants to play/practice everyday (at 10-12) at want point do you protect the kid from themselves, other coaches/dads and burn out? Or do you push them to be the best they can be? I know every situation is different but at some point you have to draw a line.

The story of the BYU football player that is likely to get drafted that didn’t start playing football until 2010, got me to thinking this morning. I doubt parents in Ghana take their kids all over west Africa playing ball. But the counter argument is, he is obviously a great athlete but got cut twice from BYU basketball.

 

[MagnoliaHunter]

Bone and joint doctors will tell you that kids 14 and under need 4 consectutive months of no throwing of baseballs. There is a reason that at the same time the select teams came on the scene with thier almost year round playing and year round practice, there was a massive increase in the number of shoulder and arm surgeries before kids get out of high school.

 

[Drebin]

Bone and joint doctors will tell you that kids 14 and under need 4 consectutive months of no throwing of baseballs. There is a reason that at the same time the select teams came on the scene with thier almost year round playing and year round practice, there was a massive increase in the number of shoulder and arm surgeries before kids get out of high school.

********. You show me a boy that goes four months without throwing anything, and I'll show you a boy that likes wearing dresses and playing with barbies. Repetitive throwing, especially long toss, is vital to arm health and should happen year round if the kid is a competitive baseball player. If a kid needs time off from throwing, it is only because he is experiencing pain...most likely because he hasn't been taught how to properly throw a ball and his mechanics are causing problems. As long as he is not throwing breaking stuff and his mechanics are sound, there are no issues with throwing. If a kid experiences the slightest bit of shoulder or arm pain, he should be shut down until it goes away, but not for four months.

There is a massive increase in shoulder and arm surgeries because there are too many coaches that don't know how to teach kids the proper way to throw....or even worse.....have them trying to throw breaking stuff.

 

[mstateglfr]

Ha, I would do most anything to get my 6yo girl interested in competing. She actually wants the other team to score in soccer so that they can feel good too. Its sweet, but its almost too foreign for me to process.

I did travel soccer, baseball, and basketball. Burnout did happen, but I also had a blast doing it all, even changing in the car going from one sport to the next. And I dont know exactly how each sport and experience helped form me, but I think doing what I did helped me be who I am today. Its something you cant measure, but is still there.


Unless one of my kids was elite, like up at the top in the nation, I dont think regional teams would happen for them. Not because of lack of interest, but because we wouldnt let them play. Or if they did play, then all other sports would have to be dropped, which is a tough line to draw, but perhaps necessary for balance.

I agree that parents in Ghana dont drag their kids all around, but talented players from there that make it in the US are the exception, not the norm. Perhaps in infrastructure and quality of life were higher over there, more kids would go around more as youth. Ghana is a safe and stable country, relative to the rest of W Africa, but I dont think youth travel teams are a priority for most parents over there.
Maybe if/when they get to that point, then there will be a flood of developed talent.

 

[615dawg]

I am actually writing a book right now that touches on this a little.

We simply as a society have crossed a line. I have talked to parents that spend thousands of dollars a year on private lessons, equipment, tournament teams, travel expenses, etc. and the kids are 8 years old.

I interviewed a parent of one of these "regional tournament team" kids. Kid is 12 years old and plays on a team that is based 60 miles from the home. At the same time, he is playing on a local team as well. Every night is practice or a game, and every weekend for 9 months a year is some tournament. The answer: "Well, we aren't going to be able to afford college, so we need to give him an opportunity to get a scholarship."

When you start discussing the financial aspects of it, you quickly see if they cut it in half, they could save more than enough for college. So at the end of the day, its usually a pride thing for the parents, or the parents are trying to live through their children.

I talked to another parent who had a son who was a really good athlete, really dominated in the 10-12 leagues, then something happened: the other kids caught up. So while he was still a good athlete, he wasn't anything special in high school.

I'm a relatively new father. I have a daughter that is 2. She currently is interested in princesses and goldfish crackers. That's fine. She might decide to play a sport one day, and that's fine - but I am committed not to make it her life just because I could not hit a high school curve ball.

 

[Drebin]

it depends on the motive of the parent. If the kid is lukewarm about it but the parent is pushing it, then it's too much. If the kid has the talent for it, and more importantly, the love for it, and the parents have the means to provide for it, then it's not too much. I tell kids all the time if they want to play ball for me that they need to love it. If they have big league dreams, getting to play year-round against the best competition does nothing more than help them realize their dreams, and gives them a huge advantage over those who don't have the means to do so.


I read Mike Piazza's book where he talked about his dad building a pitching machine in his back yard, and he hit in this thing every day, for two hours a day, rain, sleet, or snow. Too much? Maybe. But he will tell you otherwise, and it certainly helped him get to where he wanted to be.

 

[AFDawg]

I'd be interested to read that book.

To me it's at least partially a question of balance. Do they practice their sport so much that it gets in the way of family relationships or school or other talents they might have? And of course that is highly dependent on the kid's interests and what you deem important as a family.

 

[SwampDawg]

I think that extended length of participation is absolutely rediculous. I would hate for my son to have his life consumed like that for one sport. Having said that, if he had wanted to do it I guess I would have let him provided he kept of with grades, proper attitude, work around the house and so forth. Those requirements would have been explained to him in great detail. He was good enough to play select soccer, but there were not the "super" teams you are talking about. I was lucky growing up. I played basketball, dabbled in football, but mostly went swimming at the beach, running through the woods playing soldier, cowboys, Indians and so forth, and smoking cigarettes stolen from my parents. Great childhood.

 

[SignalToNoise]

You're going to get a lot of different answers because there are so many different parenting styles out there. 615 touched on two points that I know to be true from growing up in a small town:

So at the end of the day, its usually a pride thing for the parents, or the parents are trying to live through their children.

It was mostly a pissing contest to see who could have the most "athletic" kids. Like 615 said, when the kid reaches high school a lot of others have caught up. Kids from other towns will be just as good or better. The 10-12 year old standout now blends in and looks average. Dominating rec league just isn't that difficult.

 

[wrk]

My son is 9, plays travel baseball on a team 50 miles away and goes to a couple different states a year playing. My question is about "burnout". When baseball comes up a lot of people give plenty of advice about not burning your kid out. From the people I've met and talked to, it almost seems like "burnout" is used instead of "everyone caught up to him and he wasn't a star", or "found out at higher level, you couldn't go on talent alone, and didn't want to work". My son is still young, so I've got a lot to learn, but just curious if anyone else has seen the same thing.

 

[615dawg]

Its probably a year out - and the kids and sports deal is a small part of a bigger picture.

But it has been really interesting in research listening to these parents defend their behavior. It starts with "I just want Johnny to be happy," but if you dig - the parents' lives are revolving around their kids sports. Some parents will even go and form new teams so that their kids can be involved, when they aren't good enough (in their mind, its politics, but most of the time its talent) to be playing on that level.

 

[Maroonthirteen]

it depends on the motive of the parent. If the kid is lukewarm about it but the parent is pushing it, then it's too much. If the kid has the talent for it, and more importantly, the love for it, and the parents have the means to provide for it, then it's not too much. I tell kids all the time if they want to play ball for me that they need to love it. If they have big league dreams, getting to play year-round against the best competition does nothing more than help them realize their dreams, and gives them a huge advantage over those who don't have the means to do so.


I read Mike Piazza's book where he talked about his dad building a pitching machine in his back yard, and he hit in this thing every day, for two hours a day, rain, sleet, or snow. Too much? Maybe. But he will tell you otherwise, and it certainly helped him get to where he wanted to be.

I agree with all of what you said. But in my opinion it all comes down to how good of athlete your kid is. If your kid is an elite athlete, they will go far regardless of how much they train. If your kid is an average athlete, they will have to train like Piazza AND have a good head on their shoulders to play college ball. But there is a difference in taking some swings in a batting cage in your backyard and tossing the ball around with friends as opposed to traveling every weekend a couple states over and missing fishing trips, family functions, and etc. and so on.

 

[Will James]

Renfroe said he grew up hitting rocks.

I get forming the regional teams and playing over the summer, but the year round stuff is absurd. I can give my own kid the necessary off-season throwing/fundamentals practice in the yard.

 

[615dawg]

You're going to get a lot of different answers because there are so many different parenting styles out there. 615 touched on two points that I know to be true from growing up in a small town:

[/COLOR]It was mostly a pissing contest to see who could have the most "athletic" kids. Like 615 said, when the kid reaches high school a lot of others have caught up. Kids from other towns will be just as good or better. The 10-12 year old standout now blends in and looks average. Dominating rec league just isn't that difficult.

Which I'll be completely honest. I came from a small town. I loved baseball. Loved it. Still do. But the reasons I love it have changed. I enjoy the "managed failure" aspect of it.

When I was in the youth leagues, I was a star. I never could hit a curve ball though. Throw me a fast ball and I'd rip a double in the gap or take it over the 220 foot fence. As I got older, and pitchers started throwing curve balls - people started "catching up to me." But my parents (and me) blamed burn out.

 

[seshomoru]

That touches on my questions about it all.

A kid is far more likely to get college paid for and earn a good living by having good grades and getting and getting a well rounded education. The chances of a full ride and future income from playing a sport is absolutely minuscule.

And the learning to complete reasoning is complete BS. My wife's students tell her all the time about their 'select' sports they play. If it was select they would have tried out. The only thing select about it is that their parents' checks cleared.

 

[NIC.sixpack]

I don't think there is one answer. Some kids could thrive in the emerging hyper-competitive tournament scene. But that isn't the only way to improve fundamental baseball skills. Look at the example of Mike Piazza hitting in a batting cage in the backyard. And I've heard people talk about USSSA as the "best of the best." I think it's probably more accurate to say it's the "best of the kids whose parents can afford it." Somewhere, there are poor kids who spend most days during the summer playing baseball in a field with older cousins/siblings/friends who throw harder than any kid his age. That poor kid may not have the same coaching, but he is constantly working on fundamentals.

Back to the question: In large part, it depends on how old a kid is. And obviously each kid is different. I think there are some rules of thumb, though. I personally think travel ball becomes "too much" when kids miss school on Monday because they are worn out from traveling and playing all weekend. It's too much when parents choose to buy another $350 bat instead of paying a bill that month. It's too much when parents have no money in savings, but they spend hundreds of dollars on hotel rooms every weekend. It's too much when kids can't get their homework done because it took an hour to drive home after practice ended at 7:30. It's too much when they don't get to spend any time with their grandparents during the summer because they have a tournament almost every weekend.

 

[Dawghouse]

If it was select they would have tried out. The only thing select about it is that their parents' checks cleared.

That made me laugh because of how true it is.

 

[1msucub]

I'll jump in here. I have two boys, 9 and 6, that play baseball and soccer (which I know nothing about), and the older one is asking about football. The 9 year old has a twin sister that has Down Syndrome, and she isn't really functional enough for competitive sports.....she just can't process it yet. They LOVE it. The 9 year old is fast as Ray Ray and is really starting to "get it". The 6 year old still plays in the grass and throws his hat up in the air while he's in LF.

I played baseball for a pretty long time, up until I graduated high school, every year at school, and every summer locally. I was a pretty good player in my opinion...no scouts were knocking on my door, mind you, but it came natural to me. Football=another story entirely. I didn't try to walk on at State b/c I was scared of not getting into Vet school, but I wouldn't trade the memories I made with all those guys over the years for anything.

Here's what I think are the bigger issues. First, if you have kids playing community sports, next time you're at the game, take a gander at some of the equipment the kids have. $200+ bats IN THE HANDS OF 6 YEAR OLDS. $150 cleats. $100 gloves. $75 bags. Is that really what we've gotten to now? The fact that a 17 oz 28 inch DeMarini even exists is a problem in and of itself. My kids each have their own $20 Eastons from Walmart that are a few years old now, and they hit pretty freakin good with them. They aren't going to know what to do when they actually get to the point of using better equipment, but I'm not going to watch my 6 year old pound a $200 bat into an ant hill in the name of insect control. Secondly, watch how the parents act. There's a kid on the 6 year old's team that looks absolutely miserable out there, and it's because EVERY thing he does is wrong to his dad. His throws aren't lasers...his hits aren't solid...his glove isn't a black hole...he isn't paying attention...etc... I feel terrible for the kid, who will likely end up hating the game because his dad is an overbearing idiot. I am no pro when it comes to parenting, but I let my boys play and cut up and I stay OUT of the coaches' way. I NEVER get on to either boy for making mistakes in the field. I chewed the 9 year old out the other night because his attitude about playing centerfield was terrible....sucks to be fast, I guess. I hope they play as long as I did and love it as much as I still do, but I will NEVER be THAT parent; that's a promise I've made myself, my wife, and my boys. If they are good enough, someone will find them. They don't have to play 200 games a year when they are 7 in order to have a shot at a scholarship. I think "travelling/competitive" sports teams, ESPECIALLY baseball, are having a huge, negative impact in general.

That's just one small town man's perspective.

 

[615dawg]

Exactly.

Many of the parents that are doing this do not have the resources to do so, and then a lot of them overcompensate with a "Got to Keep up with the Joneses" mentality.

Say Johnny and Jimmy play on a travel team together. Johnny's dad is a doctor, and they have a good income. They suggest instead of playing in a tournament one weekend in Hattiesburg, that we go to this big Bash by the Beach in Panama City - that's where all of the elite teams are. Jimmy's parents are already scraping by - they have no money in savings and can't really afford to go to Hattiesburg, but they are living through Jimmy so they can't appear to be struggling - so not only are they on board, they go all out and put $1500 on a credit card to go down to Florida and split four games. You see where I'm going with this - crap like this is killing families.

And its not just baseball and soccer - this competitive cheerleading crap is getting just as bad. My wife has a friend that pulled their kid out of school a week to go to a cheerleading competition for her 8 year old. It was in Florida and being held during Florida's spring break.

It used to be that 90 percent of youth sports leagues were local in nature. Now you almost have to leave the state two weekends a month.

 

[615dawg]

You sir are a good parent.

Its also interesting that you are noting the same things I have found. Why would anyone buy a $200+ bat for t-ball? It used to be that you were lucky enough in the small town to get a t-shirt with a sponsor's name on front of it as a jersey and everyone wore the same pants that you could get from Wal Mart. I remember how big of a deal it was that Bill Williams Sporting Goods cut a deal one year and we were able to get our names on back of our jerseys.

Now there are 8 year old teams getting custom uniforms (home, away and yes, alternate) from Nike, Under Armour, etc. $250 uniform team for an 8 year old team.

 

[1msucub]

You sir are a good parent.

Its also interesting that you are noting the same things I have found. Why would anyone buy a $200+ bat for t-ball? It used to be that you were lucky enough in the small town to get a t-shirt with a sponsor's name on front of it as a jersey and everyone wore the same pants that you could get from Wal Mart. I remember how big of a deal it was that Bill Williams Sporting Goods cut a deal one year and we were able to get our names on back of our jerseys.

Now there are 8 year old teams getting custom uniforms (home, away and yes, alternate) from Nike, Under Armour, etc. $250 uniform team for an 8 year old team.

Morris Oil Company, Looxahoma, MS. 1978, baby.

Thanks for the good parent comment, 615. Sports are very important to me, and I HATED losing, but my kids are going to develop that attitude on their own , not because of pressure from me. It's not easy to do, for sure!

 

[MagnoliaHunter]

********. You show me a boy that goes four months without throwing anything, and I'll show you a boy that likes wearing dresses and playing with barbies. Repetitive throwing, especially long toss, is vital to arm health and should happen year round if the kid is a competitive baseball player. If a kid needs time off from throwing, it is only because he is experiencing pain...most likely because he hasn't been taught how to properly throw a ball and his mechanics are causing problems. As long as he is not throwing breaking stuff and his mechanics are sound, there are no issues with throwing. If a kid experiences the slightest bit of shoulder or arm pain, he should be shut down until it goes away, but not for four months.

There is a massive increase in shoulder and arm surgeries because there are too many coaches that don't know how to teach kids the proper way to throw....or even worse.....have them trying to throw breaking stuff.

I'm sure that you know more than the American Sports Medicine Institute.

http://www.asmi.org/research.php?page=research&section=positionStatement

 

[SignalToNoise]

Good post. That's the type of parent I'd like to be one day.

I always had Wal-Mart stuff while playing soccer growing up. In high school dad told me I could buy whatever I wanted if I got a job and paid for it, so that is what I did.

If y'all don't mind my asking, how do you handle the kid wanting to quit a sport? I played rec league baseball growing up but in the middle of one summer I decided I hated it and wanted to quit. My dad made me finish out the season and told me if I didn't want to play again the next summer then that was fine. Looking back, I feel like that was the best way to handle it. Any thoughts there?

 

[grinnindawg]

The financial aspect is one part, the other more important part is not spoiling them rotten.

Little Johnny or Jane thinks the universe revolves around them because family life does.

It is not healthy. We realized it and stopped when our kids were young.

 

[horshack.sixpack]

Anyone of you with kids playing sports knows that today, kids are playing baseball, basketball, soccer year around. Football isn’t quite as bad but…. There are tournament teams, summer teams, and 2[SUP]nd[/SUP] teams and most kids play for them all. Also, there is a movement now to form regional “tournament” teams….beyond and better than local tournament teams. I know of kids traveling 25-90 miles to practice and play with teams that are chosen teams for the purpose of being able to compete with any team in any tournament in the entire Southeast.

So, your little Johnny (10-12 years old) is very good at his particular sport. He plays on a local tournament team with kids from around town and they play in a later summer league team. Now, his coach wants to form another team with kids from all the surrounding towns chosing only the best from your local team. For the purpose of going to tournaments in Florida, North Carolina, Georgia, Missouri and so on and competing at a higher level against the best from those states. Lets say little Johnny practices 4 days a week 10 months of the year. Plays in numerous tournaments during the spring and summer. Plays in another countless number of single games during a weeknight over the year. Now a few dads, say “hey, our future MLBers can’t get behind during this time off.” So the dads form winter workouts. At what point does a parent say enough is enough? Even if the kid loves it and wants to play/practice everyday (at 10-12) at want point do you protect the kid from themselves, other coaches/dads and burn out? Or do you push them to be the best they can be? I know every situation is different but at some point you have to draw a line.

The story of the BYU football player that is likely to get drafted that didn’t start playing football until 2010, got me to thinking this morning. I doubt parents in Ghana take their kids all over west Africa playing ball. But the counter argument is, he is obviously a great athlete but got cut twice from BYU basketball.

1) Don't get more in love with the idea of your kid playing whatever sport than they are (i.e. don't push them). I see too many parent's seemingly living out their past failures through their kids. The result is miserable, resentful kids.

2) Yes, you do have to save your kids from themselves at times. Just because little Johnny is having a great time and loves it doesn't mean that it is best for him. The inmates shouldn't run the asylum.

3) Don't let kid's sports keep you constantly apart as a family. The best thing you can give your kid is a strong marriage. Prioritize family first and activities second.

4) Don't go broke paying for kid's sports and activities. It happens. Some people pay more for their kid's sports in the hopes of a scholarship and they practically (sometimes literally) could have paid for college if they'd invested the money, so they end up with kid's who hate the sport and a parent who has spend a fortune!


Of course you can do all that and you still might have your teenage daughter come up to you one day and ask why you didn't MAKE her keep playing soccer because she probably would've been "really good by now"...

 

[HammerOfTheDogs]

That's nothing. When my son was 6, he was afraid to run on the soccer field because he saw some ants and was afraid he'd step on them.

 

[1msucub]

Haven't faced quitting yet, but absolutely they have to finish the season, and they have to have a good reason for quitting (just hate the sport, like another one better, etc...) not enough playing time or wanting to play a different position aren't good enough reasons in my opinion.

Mine both know that when you start, you have to finish no matter what, even if it means riding the pine.

 

[MSUDAWG1990]

I have a son who is almost 16 and he has played travel soccer for years. I have another son who is 13 and has played travel baseball since he was 7 and also plays travel soccer. We enjoy our time going to the tournaments. They kids enjoying hanging out together. The youngest one makes straight A's in school. If he wanted to quit playing I would be fine with that. I also would be willing to bet u that the kids playing and practicing sports year round are also a lot healthier than the kids sitting in the house playing video games. Maybe if more kids were involved in sports and their parents would get outside with them we wouldn't be the fattest state

 

[615dawg]

If y'all don't mind my asking, how do you handle the kid wanting to quit a sport? I played rec league baseball growing up but in the middle of one summer I decided I hated it and wanted to quit. My dad made me finish out the season and told me if I didn't want to play again the next summer then that was fine. Looking back, I feel like that was the best way to handle it. Any thoughts there?

Your dad handled it perfectly. If your kid starts a season, they should finish it. Then they don't have to do it anymore. That's the other deal that's happening. Johnny is sitting the bench and Johnny's dad thinks he's the next Derek Jeter and he quits. Rinse, Recycle, Repeat. Then they get to high school and they have dabbled in everything but they aren't good enough to play anything at that level.

 

[NIC.sixpack]

I also would be willing to bet u that the kids playing and practicing sports year round are also a lot healthier than the kids sitting in the house playing video games. Maybe if more kids were involved in sports and their parents would get outside with them we wouldn't be the fattest state

That seems like a given. I think most people posting come from a generation that didn't have the option of sitting in the house playing video games, so the idea is almost foreign to us. Most of us probably grew up being outside practically all day long during the summer. There wasn't really anything to do inside. I knew some kids whose parents expected them to stay outside unless it was raining or it was ridiculously hot outside (i.e., 103 degrees or something unusual). For us, staying indoors would have been sort of like a punishment. I think the issue most people have is when involvement or investment in one sport becomes unbalanced.

 

[NIC.sixpack]

grinnindawg, that is an excellent point.

 

[Drebin]

I'm sure that you know more than the American Sports Medicine Institute.

http://www.asmi.org/research.php?page=research&section=positionStatement

If that is what they are saying, then yes, I know more than them. Real world experience is funny like that. The pussification of America continues.

 

[lefty96]

My son is 8. He does basketball and football. Basketball is 8 games, football is 8 plus playoffs. We don't do baseball outside our yard because of the ridiculous demands on time. Baseball has gotten crazy.

 

[UpTheMiddlex3Punt]

Chances are your little Johnny isn't going to play in the majors, so I wouldn't worry about him falling behind during the winter. There's a principle called 'regression to the mean' which in this case can be summed up as 'the best 10 year old baseball player will most probably not be the best 20 year old baseball player.' It doesn't matter how many camps you do.

Since your kid isn't going to grow up to make millions playing sports, you're better off focusing on developing healthy habits and a love of physical activity, including competitive activity. It seems like we have an attitude in our society that if you don't make it at the next level, quit playing. For as sports obsessed as we are, we are a nation of fat-asses.

 

[MSUDAWG1990]

Well we play soccer in Jackson this weekend and he will not be able to sleep he will be so excited. As long as he is like that i will take him to play. He played on the school baseball team this year and was so far ahead of those kids because they had not played travel. I have been raising them as a single dad and i can tell u that i wouldn't trade our trips for anything

 

[madisonmd]

I am absolutely loving this thread! I am a father of a baseball player that is about to conclude his SR season. We started years ago in rec ball{he was not very good, but athletic} and progressed to travel ball as he improved. It was reasonable travel ball and I stayed uninvolved. My only pledge to myself was if my son asked to throw I never said no. BTW, those requests to throw grow more and more scarce as the boys grow and face other distractions,i.e. girls.As we hit school ball, I let the coaches take over all development issues. To think a boy in todays baseball climate is going to get scholarship money is ludicrous.Believe me , we have spent some money on baseball to some extent ourselves. My story concludes with an absolutely disastrous SR season in which my son wanted to quit in early JAN, when some of his buddies quit.Our season has been terrible as far as W's and L's, but with encouragement from home he stuck it out. I hope one day he will look back and be proud of his participation, I know as parents we are! Point is, these kids change so much when they hit high school and future success is really fleeting. If anything, I told my son it is so important to be part of a team and strive for a common goal even if results are disappointing.Seize the moment and enjoy each day!

 

[TimberBeast]

I still remember one season wanting to quit soccer and my dad telling me the exact same thing. You finish the season, go to every practice and every game, you are part of a team and they depend on you to be there. You started it so you have to finish it. I played for several more years after that. There are two huge life lessons in that one small conversation. Finish what you start, always see things through, and never quit on your team.

 

[coach66]

The sad reality is that if you aspire for your kid to have the experience of

being a contributor on most High School teams of any size then you have no choice but to get them involved
and keep them involved with tournament or select programs because everyone else is. If you live in a small town or attend a small school it is not such a big deal if your child is a good athlete they will be fine. If they are a Madison Central or Germantown, Clinton, Brandon, etc then it is a different story.

I really only want my kids to have a good High School sports experience and have actually discouraged playing college ball. College ball is a fricking job and college is for having fun, making friends, making great grades and preparing one's self for life. My daughter had six college soccer offers and did not seriously consider any of them.

 

[Negative Waves]

I can say that when my wife and I have kids, there is no way we're going to do

what parents are doing these days. Talking to those around the office, I hear of traveling to Florida for soccer and baseball games, weekend trips to Hattiesburg and Gulfport, etc., not getting back until 11:00 Sunday night, and spending crazy amounts of money on bats and equipment. Rec ball supposedly doesn't "cut it" anymore, and now if you want your kid to get anywhere in life, they better be on a traveling or select team. When I was a kid, baseball was a summer sport, and everyone played rec ball. My bat was a hand me down Easton bat that had part of the grip torn off, but it hit just fine. Plus, we didn't have to have fund raisers or ask for money in front of the grocery store to fund trips. It seems now (especially in baseball and soccer) that it has been taken to the extreme.

On a side note, it's interesting when driving around town you see all the mini vans with the baseball or soccer stickers on the back with the kid's name and number on them. One even had 3 color photographs of their son playing baseball covering the entire back window of the van. I wonder if his parents bow down to him every night? Everybody finds something or someone to worship in their lives. I'm guessing for those folks it's their kids.

 

[Xenomorph]

At this point, most parents who currently have young kids have a story..

..like the one I'll quickly write here:

Last Sunday I was making small talk with a guy I don't really care for at a church function. I asked him what their summer looks like and if they have a vacation planned. He said with all the baseball they couldn't afford a vacation.

I asked how much baseball they planned to play.

He said beginning May 3rd their son's travel baseball team was signed up to play in 14 tournaments until school started back. I did some quick math in my head and said.. Isn't that like 14 tournaments in 16 weekends? He said Yeah, but 2 are in town so it's not so bad. Madison, Southaven, Birmingham, Destin, Gulf Shores, Hattiesburg, etc. .........But 2 are in town so it's not so bad.

Mind you.. I know they've already played a crapload this spring.

My wife was listening to our conversation and said to me after he walked off... They have Lost. Their. Minds. And I agreed.

When I was 10 years old in the summer all I wanted was to see dad's truck hooked to the fishing boat on Friday evenings so I knew we were going to the lake the next morning. To hell with 70 baseball games in one summer.