I know what you're thinking, but hear me out...
today I lucked into a couple of tickets in section 107, row 12 of our beloved Humphrey Coliseum for the game tonight. When I got there I was very pleased with the seats, and as an added bonus I was 3-4 seats away from the General. We exchanged pleasantries before the game and I thought this would be a lovely evening of basketball. Then she walked in...
The "woman" who sat on the row behind us was clearly the result of genetic experimentation, no doubt due to some sick scientist who foolishly thought that splicing Rosanne Barr's DNA with that of a banshee was a good idea. Imagine the sound you hate the most...fingernails on a chalk board, babies crying, whatever. Now imagine that sound harnessed and focused into a voice that screamed the most inane and idiotic things you could think of at a basketball game.
Here are some examples, accompanied by pronunciation guides:
"Get him off him!" (<span style="font-style: italic;">git 'im awf 'iim)</span>
"Come on ref!" (<span style="font-style: italic;">*** awn rey-uf)</span>
"How 'bout a foul!" (<span style="font-style: italic;">how bowt uh fa-yull</span><span style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;">)</span></span></span></span></span></span>
But the highlight, for me, was when this mental-midget of a fan started screaming at the top of her sizable lungs for a goal tending call...while we were on defense.
And so I am sending out a prayer request that you all keep HD6 in your thoughts, because he's got to sit through that **** for the rest of the season. Sir, if you make it the whole season with her sitting back there spewing that stupidity and still haven't killed her then I will personally nominate you for sainthood.
today I lucked into a couple of tickets in section 107, row 12 of our beloved Humphrey Coliseum for the game tonight. When I got there I was very pleased with the seats, and as an added bonus I was 3-4 seats away from the General. We exchanged pleasantries before the game and I thought this would be a lovely evening of basketball. Then she walked in...
The "woman" who sat on the row behind us was clearly the result of genetic experimentation, no doubt due to some sick scientist who foolishly thought that splicing Rosanne Barr's DNA with that of a banshee was a good idea. Imagine the sound you hate the most...fingernails on a chalk board, babies crying, whatever. Now imagine that sound harnessed and focused into a voice that screamed the most inane and idiotic things you could think of at a basketball game.
Here are some examples, accompanied by pronunciation guides:
"Get him off him!" (<span style="font-style: italic;">git 'im awf 'iim)</span>
"Come on ref!" (<span style="font-style: italic;">*** awn rey-uf)</span>
"How 'bout a foul!" (<span style="font-style: italic;">how bowt uh fa-yull</span><span style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;"><span style="font-style: italic;">)</span></span></span></span></span></span>
But the highlight, for me, was when this mental-midget of a fan started screaming at the top of her sizable lungs for a goal tending call...while we were on defense.
And so I am sending out a prayer request that you all keep HD6 in your thoughts, because he's got to sit through that **** for the rest of the season. Sir, if you make it the whole season with her sitting back there spewing that stupidity and still haven't killed her then I will personally nominate you for sainthood.
