There are many gun shops that have firing ranges inside and will let you try a weapon first. Suggest you do that first to see how a weapon performs, feels for grip, and how effective it would be for stopping power. If you settle for smaller caliber pistols, hollow points would be a better choice of ammo for in home use imo.
Warrior is right.
1. Try before you buy. Each person shoots differently.
2. Practice, practice, practice. It doesn’t matter if it’s a shotgun, rifle, or handgun. An unpracticed person can miss the mark even at closer ranges.
3. What caliber? The bottom line is you want the largest caliber that you can still hit your target. For example, a .22 to the heart or head is better than a .45 to the arm. Also, cost and availability of ammo matters. 10mm is quite a bit more expensive than 9mm. 32-20 is much harder to find than 9mm.
4. Revolver vs semi. To be honest, both are simple to use. Both are reliable (see brands below). It’s all about what you practice with.....and ammo capacity.
5. Brands - in general it’s better to go with higher end brands. For example a High Point is better than nothing, but a Glock is better than a Glock. Don’t be afraid to buy used. I’d rather buy a mildly used Glock than a brand new High Point.
6. Brand snobs - Glocks are great but they’re not the end all, be all. S&W MP, Springfield, HK, Walther, Sig, FN, Etc all make great, reliable guns.
7. Purpose - Range? Home? Carry? All of the above? Something like a Glock 19 is a good do all gun. A Glock 43 can do all but is slanted more towards carry. A Glock 17 gets harder to carry.
8. Keep it safe. Store it properly. Plenty of bedside safes available.
9. Penetration - most of this is overblown and is a myth. Some people say, “don’t go with an AR because it over penetrates....go pistol.” That’s BS. A 5.56 rd doesn’t penetrate like some claim. For home defense you’ll probably use expanding ammo so penetration probably won’t be an issue unless yo go with larger calibers.
10. AR vs handgun. First, ARs usually have larger ammo capacity.....and often are easier to get accurate shots for lesser trained people. Handguns are quicker and more mobile in a home environment. Go with you’re more practiced and comfortable with.
11. Myth of shotguns - by far the biggest thing is spread. Most home encounters happen at less then 5 yds. Your average home defense shotgun using 00 buck will spread about the size of a golf ball.....maybe a tennis ball.....at that distance. So the thought that you don’t have to aim as much is a fallacy. Also remember that a single 9mm to the heart is waaay better than a shotgun to the arm. Not to mention than shotguns often hold 3-8 shots at the most. A medium framed Glock 19 holds 15-17. And shotguns are usually much slower to load.....unless you go Saiga, etc. Also, many ranges don’t allow shotguns to practice with.
12. Consider training - let’s say you’re eyeing a $1200 Wilson Combat 45 that’ll be the best shooting handgun you can afford. But who would be better off? The guy with the Wilson Combat or a guy who buys a $500 gun, a bunch of ammo, and takes a course?