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T-TownDawgg

T-TownDawgg

All-Conference
Nov 4, 2015
4,778
4,861
113
I’d begin with some Prince Albert jokes, but they’d be over your head.

Welcome, Cocks! We have been prone-bone pounded for decades by collegiate football mediocrity, so we demand a firm commitment to laying down impressive insults. When you lazily dribble pathetic 8th grade drivel, we will left-handed beat you til we’re blind.

Anywhoo, I like your Upstate women, but on the Columbia plains it was a little dry. By the time you get to Myrtle Beach, the sidewalks are soaked with the snail-trails of tattoo clad herion skaaanks with labia piercings.

SixPackSpeak is a kind, but not-so-nice motley crew of cantankerous, disillusioned sports fans who found out the hard way that marriage was just a cruel way to inform us that our life of masturbation had only begun. We have developed a sophisticated sense of humor and protect our little site with 16-bit cybersecurity.

We’ve had your versions of Shrimp’n grits and BBQ sauce. I’d rather jam my Cock through one of your carnival beach funnel cakes and get Lindsey Graham’s daughter beat it with a broomstick like an East Coast piñata than call it great food.

Saturday, MSU will leave a wake of shatrered hopes and stretched sandy plantation vaginas that would make William Tecumseh Sherman green with penis envy.
 
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HotMop

HotMop

All-American
May 8, 2006
8,516
7,232
113
T-TownDawgg said:
I’d begin with some Prince Albert jokes, but they’d be over your head.

Welcome, Cocks! We have been prone-bone pounded for decades by collegiate football mediocrity, so we demand a firm commitment to laying down impressive insults. When you lazily dribble pathetic 8th grade drivel, we will left-handed beat you til we’re blind.

Anywhoo, I like your Upstate women, but on the Columbia plains it was a little dry. By the time you get to Myrtle Beach, the sidewalks are soaked with the snail-trails of tattoo clad herion skaaanks with labia piercings.

SixPackSpeak is a kind, but not-so-nice motley crew of cantankerous, disillusioned sports fans who found out the hard way that marriage was just a cruel way to inform us that our life of masturbation had only begun. We’ve have developed a sophisticated sense of humor and protect our little site with 16-bit cybersecurity.

We’ve had your versions of Shrimp’n grits and BBQ sauce. I’d rather jam my Cock through one of your carnival beach funnel cakes and get Lindsey Graham’s daughter beat it with a broomstick like an East Coast piñata than call it great food.

Saturday, MSU will leave a wake of shatrered hopes and stretched sandy plantation vaginas that would make William Tecumseh Sherman green with penis envy.
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Leaving James Harden GIF by Farmers Insurance ®
 
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Drebin

Drebin

Heisman
Aug 22, 2012
22,370
26,964
113
T-TownDawgg said:
we will left-handed beat you til we’re blind.
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The rest of your post was hit and miss. But this right here? This right here?

I'd like to nominate that we retroactively add this to the countdown slogan thread and proclaim it the winner.
 
Dawgbite

Dawgbite

Heisman
Nov 1, 2011
9,776
11,032
113
SchrodingersDawg said:
That gotdamn Carolina bbq sauce is an abomination.
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I hope we beat the Cocks like a red headed step child but insulting their BBQ sauce is just wrong. There’s no such thing as bad BBQ sauce. Even that white stuff from North Alabama has its place and time. Currently mustard based sauce is probably my favorite.
 
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Drebin

Drebin

Heisman
Aug 22, 2012
22,370
26,964
113
Dawgbite said:
I hope we beat the Cocks like a red headed step child but insulting their BBQ sauce is just wrong. There’s no such thing as bad BBQ sauce. Even that white stuff from North Alabama has its place and time. Currently mustard based sauce is probably my favorite.
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This is probably the most inaccurate thing ever posted on sixpack.

There is such a thing as bad BBQ sauce. Absolutely there is.
 
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ZombieKissinger

ZombieKissinger

All-American
May 29, 2013
5,479
9,355
113
Dawgbite said:
I hope we beat the Cocks like a red headed step child but insulting their BBQ sauce is just wrong. There’s no such thing as bad BBQ sauce. Even that white stuff from North Alabama has its place and time. Currently mustard based sauce is probably my favorite.
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Mustard is one of those things that I really want one time out of five, but if it was the only kind of sauce available, I’d be incredibly depressed
 
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M

MSUDOG24

All-Conference
Mar 31, 2021
1,493
1,434
113
ZombieKissinger said:
Mustard is one of those things that I really want one time out of five, but if it was the only kind of sauce available, I’d be incredibly depressed
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We had a friend who grew up in Columbia and turned us on to Maurice's Yellow Gold. He'd grill chicken nearly every Saturday night using it when we got together. We haven't used anything for grilled chicken since and been getting it shipped to us for nearly 40 years. That said, it's the only thing we use it on. Otherwise, give me Stubb's Original for pulled pork and nothing on ribs.

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