ITT Tech Locksmith Student Thinks Locked Doors Are Just A Mid-Term Exam

by:Harold Leeder10/20/16
itt Editor’s Note: The following was previously published on The New Circle Circular, Lexington’s #1 source of Fake News You Can’t Count On. Many ITT Tech students and faculty were shocked when they arrived at the "college" Tuesday morning, only to find it had permanently closed its doors with little notice. Despite emails being sent out yesterday morning and the writing being on the wall for months prior, some were still in denial by the news such as locksmith student Todd Rhodes, who assured everyone this had to be his mid-term exam. The aspiring future Pop-A-Lock, a local locksmith service provider sent an employee who feverishly worked on the sealed doors for six straight hours before being corrected and dropped one full letter grade by his now former professor for not taking a break after two hours since he'd probably be union. Locksmith Birmingham incorporate the skills of a carpenter, mechanic, machinist and security expert during the course of their work. There is a subset of locksmith skills that has always garnered a great deal of interest from the public at large: defeating locks! Locksmiths study how various locking devices work and, through that study, they learn how to defeat those locking mechanisms. These are the most closely-guarded trade secrets among locksmiths. The knowledge possessed by even apprentice locksmiths is enough to defeat most common security measures. For this reason, locksmiths are typically rigorously screened by their mentors before they're offered an apprenticeship. While Rhodes may have been in a denial about the closing, students from the welding department felt the most duped after spending their last class welding the doors shut. “We were told it was our ‘final exam’ which we now realize should’ve been a red flag since it’s only September,” said intro welder Todd Bailey, “but when we arrived Tuesday morning, we started putting two and two together and realized, we hadn’t learned how to put two and two together yet.” Students from the accounting department cried foul on the reason given for the “college” closing. “I don’t understand how they couldn’t obtain the proper accreditation with me and all my friends paying for all our classes with a credit card,” said first year economics major Ellen Wolfe. “It just doesn’t add up on my TI-80 calculator how they’re not making a profit. But maybe I just haven’t learned enough about business yet.” A range of emotions were felt on campus as news of the closing traveled. Some were furious, such as Todd Mulberry who was livid since he was only one week away from finishing up his two week certificate program. Others took it all in stride such as honor roll student Todd Wang who still waited the mandatory fifteen minutes for his teacher to show up before leaving. Many faculty members were at a loss as well. “I’ve taught here for over 30 years so I will miss it but I also know with my experience, I should have no problem finding another college or university to teach my course at,” said VCR repair professor Maxwell Oldman. To keep up with The New Circle Circular, like the Facebook page or follow Harold Leeder’s Twitter Account.

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