Alabama - King Solomon. No matter what you have, what you
accomplish, or who you become, he will insist on topping you regardless
of the costs involved or who he has to step on to get there. The Old
Testament Law only allowed for one wife. Solomon claimed 300. Many
authorities dispute that number. Obviously 299 of them decided to
transfer due to ‘medical conditions’. His 700 concubines received
Grayshirts, hoping to eventually move up to wife status.
Arkansas - Moses. Wandering around up there in the
wilderness/Ozarks searching for the Promised Land of an SEC Title.
There's a good chance all the current followers will be dead before they
actually get there.
Auburn - Judas Iscariot. One of the original members, but later
proved to be deceitful and very untrustworthy. Sold his soul for 30
pieces of silver. After inflation, that comes to about $180,000.
Florida - Satan. Pure evil, incredibly arrogant, an enemy of
mankind who leads you to believe he has everything you want your program
to be, but will one day be cast into a lake of fire. Great Deceiver who
occasionally leads astray even the most righteous. Though it has been
said "the Devil wears Prada", he actually wears jean shorts.
Georgia - Job. Once very well off and prosperous while doing
things the right way, now going through some very difficult times and
relying on faith to carry him. Could come out on the other side better
off than ever before.
Kentucky - Jezebel. Spent her entire life worshiping the false god BasketBaal and trying to deter people from the true faith.
LSU - Lot. Flourishing in the heart of Sodom and Gommorah.
Ole Miss - Cain. Never satisfied with what he has, believes he
deserves much more. Carries a mark for past sins, and is jealous of his
brother(s).
Mississippi State - Bartholomew. We know he was one of the 12,
but we never hear about him and nothing much is ever written of him,
though it is presumed he somehow managed to triumph over Satan.
South Carolina - Aaron. Brother of Moses. Assembled all of the
riches in a poor area (Columbia) to erect a Golden Calf (Steve Spurrier)
for the people to worship.
Tennessee - The Prodigal Son. Lived a prosperous life, but wanted
much more. He was willing to sacrifice all morals to live in the
bright light of the nation's eyes, even if it meant hiring Lane Kiffin.
That life of luxury was not all it cracked up to be, and he fell on hard
times. He came crawling back to his roots, begging for forgiveness and a
return to a normal life.
Vanderbilt - Apostle Paul. Completely dedicated his life to the
true gospel of the university system (academics) and is constantly
beaten and abused for it.
accomplish, or who you become, he will insist on topping you regardless
of the costs involved or who he has to step on to get there. The Old
Testament Law only allowed for one wife. Solomon claimed 300. Many
authorities dispute that number. Obviously 299 of them decided to
transfer due to ‘medical conditions’. His 700 concubines received
Grayshirts, hoping to eventually move up to wife status.
Arkansas - Moses. Wandering around up there in the
wilderness/Ozarks searching for the Promised Land of an SEC Title.
There's a good chance all the current followers will be dead before they
actually get there.
Auburn - Judas Iscariot. One of the original members, but later
proved to be deceitful and very untrustworthy. Sold his soul for 30
pieces of silver. After inflation, that comes to about $180,000.
Florida - Satan. Pure evil, incredibly arrogant, an enemy of
mankind who leads you to believe he has everything you want your program
to be, but will one day be cast into a lake of fire. Great Deceiver who
occasionally leads astray even the most righteous. Though it has been
said "the Devil wears Prada", he actually wears jean shorts.
Georgia - Job. Once very well off and prosperous while doing
things the right way, now going through some very difficult times and
relying on faith to carry him. Could come out on the other side better
off than ever before.
Kentucky - Jezebel. Spent her entire life worshiping the false god BasketBaal and trying to deter people from the true faith.
LSU - Lot. Flourishing in the heart of Sodom and Gommorah.
Ole Miss - Cain. Never satisfied with what he has, believes he
deserves much more. Carries a mark for past sins, and is jealous of his
brother(s).
Mississippi State - Bartholomew. We know he was one of the 12,
but we never hear about him and nothing much is ever written of him,
though it is presumed he somehow managed to triumph over Satan.
South Carolina - Aaron. Brother of Moses. Assembled all of the
riches in a poor area (Columbia) to erect a Golden Calf (Steve Spurrier)
for the people to worship.
Tennessee - The Prodigal Son. Lived a prosperous life, but wanted
much more. He was willing to sacrifice all morals to live in the
bright light of the nation's eyes, even if it meant hiring Lane Kiffin.
That life of luxury was not all it cracked up to be, and he fell on hard
times. He came crawling back to his roots, begging for forgiveness and a
return to a normal life.
Vanderbilt - Apostle Paul. Completely dedicated his life to the
true gospel of the university system (academics) and is constantly
beaten and abused for it.