I honestly can't believe you even posted this- are you in the Klan? Like seriously, you really posted this on a public forum for anyone to read? "and how wypipo don't be seasonin' dey food" in faux black voice might be some of the most racist shi t I've ever read online. You'd get your as s beat in a second down here in the south if you EVER said anything like this.
Stay in Iowa. Please. For your own sake.