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i have obtained a goat

BingleCocktail

BingleCocktail

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May 25, 2014
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what should i do with a goat that i have? keep in mind that i dont want to kill it or anything like that.

it's sort of large, with white coat and some brown spots. my neighbor down the road gave it to me and i thought it would sleep through the night, but it keeps me awake going "maa maa"

i thought if i put a blanket on the goat, it would go to sleep, but I tried that and it bit me.

i read that you can hypnotize a goat by pinch their back above their hips on their rear legs and the same spot on their front then gently lay the goat on its side but i tried that and the goat bit me again.

will the goat stop s—-ting everywhere if i feed it less? so far i've just fed it fritos and green beans.

do you think a daycare would like this goat as a pet?
 
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NWADawg

NWADawg

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You can lease it out to people for fence row cleaning and such. Put a harness on it and start making it earn its keep.
 
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msstatelp1

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BingleCocktail said:
what should i do with a goat that i have? keep in mind that i dont want to kill it or anything like that.

it's sort of large, with white coat and some brown spots. my neighbor down the road gave it to me and i thought it would sleep through the night, but it keeps me awake going "maa maa"

i thought if i put a blanket on the goat, it would go to sleep, but I tried that and it bit me.

i read that you can hypnotize a goat by pinch their back above their hips on their rear legs and the same spot on their front then gently lay the goat on its side but i tried that and the goat bit me again.

will the goat stop s—-ting everywhere if i feed it less? so far i've just fed it fritos and green beans.

do you think a daycare would like this goat as a pet?
Click to expand...
Just ask Golden Eagle fans about the effects of feeding animals less.
 
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Shmuley

Shmuley

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BingleCocktail said:
what should i do with a goat that i have? keep in mind that i dont want to kill it or anything like that.

it's sort of large, with white coat and some brown spots. my neighbor down the road gave it to me and i thought it would sleep through the night, but it keeps me awake going "maa maa"

i thought if i put a blanket on the goat, it would go to sleep, but I tried that and it bit me.

i read that you can hypnotize a goat by pinch their back above their hips on their rear legs and the same spot on their front then gently lay the goat on its side but i tried that and the goat bit me again.

will the goat stop s—-ting everywhere if i feed it less? so far i've just fed it fritos and green beans.

do you think a daycare would like this goat as a pet?
Click to expand...
This thread is totally incomplete until PoopBaldHead appears.
 
LocalBeachBum

LocalBeachBum

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The Clinton jaycees raffled a goat as a fundraiser. You could buy tickets for your friends or neighbors. They would approach the friend and sell the goat raffle insurance. If their name was drawn and they had insurance, they didn’t get the goat.

I don’t know how it worked out at the end. I thought it was a funny concept.
 
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Dawgbite

Dawgbite

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Goat Bleating GIF
 
OopsICroomedmypants

OopsICroomedmypants

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BingleCocktail said:
what should i do with a goat that i have? keep in mind that i dont want to kill it or anything like that.

it's sort of large, with white coat and some brown spots. my neighbor down the road gave it to me and i thought it would sleep through the night, but it keeps me awake going "maa maa"

i thought if i put a blanket on the goat, it would go to sleep, but I tried that and it bit me.

i read that you can hypnotize a goat by pinch their back above their hips on their rear legs and the same spot on their front then gently lay the goat on its side but i tried that and the goat bit me again.

will the goat stop s—-ting everywhere if i feed it less? so far i've just fed it fritos and green beans.

do you think a daycare would like this goat as a pet?
Click to expand...
I’m just going to say this once. You just wrote the rough draft to a wonderful children’s book.
 
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She Mate Me

She Mate Me

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I'm very, very confused and pretty amused at this point.

Watch out for coyotes, unless your goat starts acting like Black Phillip...
 
kb549

kb549

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My wife and daughter want 2 goats. I said only if they are fainting goats, so I can go out and smoke a bowl and laugh at scaring them. Our property backs up to several hundred acres of woods and we hear coyotes nearly every night, so it’s offs for now.
 
Dawgbite

Dawgbite

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True goat story. About 20 years ago at work, all the supervisors cooked for all the employees once per year. This years menu was BBQ and somebody suggested that we needed to cook a goat along with the pork. We had a truck driver who was a livestock trader so we told him to get a goat for us. The day before the BBQ he brings a goat to work in his livestock trailer. After work a couple of us are going to kill and clean the goat to get ready to cook early the next morning. A supervisor gets a 22 pistol out of his truck. I’m holding the goat and he shoots it in the top of its head. We go inside to get a forklift to raise the goat and skin it. We drive up to the goat and it jumps up and runs off. There we are chasing a goat around the plant Parking lot. We finally corral it in a corner and catch it. The guy shoots it again in the head and we drag it back to the forklift to skin it. Turns out the first bullet had just ricocheted off its head and knocked the goat out. A couple of guys hang the goat from the forks and proceeded to skin it. About the time they get the skin about half way down it’s belly, the goat bleats. I’m freaking out. The goat has been shot twice and it’s still alive. One of the goat skinners quickly cuts its throat. We cooked it but I don’t think any of us that were present could eat any of it without hearing that Baaaaa. We kept that story quiet during the next days lunch.
 
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OG Goat Holder

OG Goat Holder

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BingleCocktail said:
what should i do with a goat that i have? keep in mind that i dont want to kill it or anything like that.

it's sort of large, with white coat and some brown spots. my neighbor down the road gave it to me and i thought it would sleep through the night, but it keeps me awake going "maa maa"

i thought if i put a blanket on the goat, it would go to sleep, but I tried that and it bit me.

i read that you can hypnotize a goat by pinch their back above their hips on their rear legs and the same spot on their front then gently lay the goat on its side but i tried that and the goat bit me again.

will the goat stop s—-ting everywhere if i feed it less? so far i've just fed it fritos and green beans.

do you think a daycare would like this goat as a pet?
Click to expand...
Hold it.
 
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She Mate Me

She Mate Me

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Dawgbite said:
True goat story. About 20 years ago at work, all the supervisors cooked for all the employees once per year. This years menu was BBQ and somebody suggested that we needed to cook a goat along with the pork. We had a truck driver who was a livestock trader so we told him to get a goat for us. The day before the BBQ he brings a goat to work in his livestock trailer. After work a couple of us are going to kill and clean the goat to get ready to cook early the next morning. A supervisor gets a 22 pistol out of his truck. I’m holding the goat and he shoots it in the top of its head. We go inside to get a forklift to raise the goat and skin it. We drive up to the goat and it jumps up and runs off. There we are chasing a goat around the plant Parking lot. We finally corral it in a corner and catch it. The guy shoots it again in the head and we drag it back to the forklift to skin it. Turns out the first bullet had just ricocheted off its head and knocked the goat out. A couple of guys hang the goat from the forks and proceeded to skin it. About the time they get the skin about half way down it’s belly, the goat bleats. I’m freaking out. The goat has been shot twice and it’s still alive. One of the goat skinners quickly cuts its throat. We cooked it but I don’t think any of us that were present could eat any of it without hearing that Baaaaa. We kept that story quiet during the next days lunch.
Click to expand...

I could have done without that story. Get a bigger caliber. And a better shooter.
 
preacher_dawg

preacher_dawg

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Can the goat catch a pass or block? I would say can it dunk, but I'm more confident in our basketball teams than our football team now.

I thought this might be a thread on who was going to be the GOAT for us tonight.
 
BingleCocktail

BingleCocktail

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May 25, 2014
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BingleCocktail said:
what should i do with a goat that i have? keep in mind that i dont want to kill it or anything like that.

it's sort of large, with white coat and some brown spots. my neighbor down the road gave it to me and i thought it would sleep through the night, but it keeps me awake going "maa maa"

i thought if i put a blanket on the goat, it would go to sleep, but I tried that and it bit me.

i read that you can hypnotize a goat by pinch their back above their hips on their rear legs and the same spot on their front then gently lay the goat on its side but i tried that and the goat bit me again.

will the goat stop s—-ting everywhere if i feed it less? so far i've just fed it fritos and green beans.

do you think a daycare would like this goat as a pet?
Click to expand...
decided to name him “yancy”.

updates to follow in the adventures of yancy
 
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Walkthedawg

Walkthedawg

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kb549 said:
My wife and daughter want 2 goats. I said only if they are fainting goats, so I can go out and smoke a bowl and laugh at scaring them. Our property backs up to several hundred acres of woods and we hear coyotes nearly every night, so it’s offs for now.
Click to expand...

My uncle had a rust bucket POS Mazda farm truck that would backfire like a shotgun.

guy down the road had some of those fainting goats. Uncle would leave out at 6am. I would hear him downshift and hold 3rd gear till he got next to that pasture. Then clutch and let off gas.. then BAMN!!

all the those goats would spazz out and hit their sides. Dude said my uncle reminded him of the mailman in Funny Farm with the POS truck and the laugh you could hear in the house.
 
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Conman90

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I can't believe that this site is still there.
I also can't believe nobody posted this yet.
Please come back Saddawg, we need you in these dark times.

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Goat’s Dick 2015

If you follow me on Twitter you have probably seen me posting a hashtag of #GoatsDick15. I have had many inquires wondering what the hell I was talking about. It’s a long story, so if you ain…
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