N.O.B.
- Thread starter mashburned
- Start date
Don't go crossing KFC products with Hardee's fires!!!!!!
He's one sad mofo. I'll bet that doctor guy sells drugs.
I was reading another board. Some Las Vegas attorney on there lost his job, so everybody's giving him advice. Here is the best.
Time to activate Snowman Plan 51.
Here's what you do:
When no one is looking, Pull a big plant out of a pot and take a nasty **** in it and put the plant back in it. They'll never find it, but they'll smell it for a long time.
Go back 3 days later saying you forgot something and ask what that smell is. They'll say they have no idea. Then tell them you can get rid of it if they give you your job back. When they agree, say, "Smells like one of these plants has 'root rot' to me. Happened in the last firm I was at. Shouldn't take long for me to find it." Boom. Ol' DaveSnedeker is in the big office looking at the Bellagio fountain!
You're welcome.
Time to activate Snowman Plan 51.
Here's what you do:
When no one is looking, Pull a big plant out of a pot and take a nasty **** in it and put the plant back in it. They'll never find it, but they'll smell it for a long time.
Go back 3 days later saying you forgot something and ask what that smell is. They'll say they have no idea. Then tell them you can get rid of it if they give you your job back. When they agree, say, "Smells like one of these plants has 'root rot' to me. Happened in the last firm I was at. Shouldn't take long for me to find it." Boom. Ol' DaveSnedeker is in the big office looking at the Bellagio fountain!
You're welcome.
Chimpanzee Plan 12
Here's what you do:
Timing is essential. If Snowman Plan 51 fails to get your job back do not panic. Immediately activate Chimpanzee Plan 12 by discretely removing the feces from the potted plant and throwing it in the face of the CEO. Do not immediately wash hands. Proceed to walk out of office with head held high smearing remaining feces on anything within reach while wildly laughing in a loud and menacing Joker-esque manner. Be fully prepared to immediately change professions.
Here's what you do:
Timing is essential. If Snowman Plan 51 fails to get your job back do not panic. Immediately activate Chimpanzee Plan 12 by discretely removing the feces from the potted plant and throwing it in the face of the CEO. Do not immediately wash hands. Proceed to walk out of office with head held high smearing remaining feces on anything within reach while wildly laughing in a loud and menacing Joker-esque manner. Be fully prepared to immediately change professions.
Wow. Ray coming out of the box STRONG!!!
You like the Yankees, Ray? They won 8-straight ya know.
We ran out of hardwood cleaner (lol) recently. My wife told me to just put Pledge on a swiffer and sweep around.
Holy ****. Don't do that.
I have nearly died several times. Dog always runs in from outside when it's dinner time. She just barrelled head first into the wall then slipped around like it was icy AF in here.
Holy ****. Don't do that.
I have nearly died several times. Dog always runs in from outside when it's dinner time. She just barrelled head first into the wall then slipped around like it was icy AF in here.
[roll]
I've had Pledge get on the wood floor while dusting other furniture. I know what you mean. Slippery as snot.
Reminds me of a cat I had when I was a kid. Mom had this old coffee table that was her grandmother's and she would pledge that thing weekly. One weekend she was cleaning that table, and I guess the cat got interested in watching the rag she was using go back and forth. Next thing we saw was the cat take a run and jump on the table, slide all the way across it, and tumble over the edge after failing to put on the brakes.
As funny as that was, I would have laughed my *** off seeing a dog plow into a wall like that.
Yeah that stuff is no joke. I felt sorry for the dog but it was funny and she didn't seem to care too much. Eye on the prize. Food was in sight.
As much as I love animals this story pleases me much.
Hate to say this..but the goofy bastid acts like me when I'm drinking the juice from the devil, (NO not devil dick pecker juice either!)....I'm seriously effin embarrassed.
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Whatever. That dude needs to vamoose. Plus he's the biggest psycho in the Paddock.
The Paddock never forgets...
Well, this is an interesting set of words for my phone to think I want to start a post with.
opcorn:Looks like drama over in the old d-league thread. And a little bit here. Interesting.
I try to live by a simple, six-word creed -- don't start none, won't be none.
Zardoz has now spoken even truer words of wisdom. Except Zardoz is somewhat mistaken…for it is Cantrell's Rule.
So, jackals, always remember and never forget…live by Cantrell's Rule and Apollo is the Creed.