So there's this pirate walking down the street; has a steering wheel in his pants. He enters a Subway and says: "arrrrr, make me a turkey sub, ye scallywag".
As the guy behind the counter gets to work on the sub, he notices the steering wheel and asks the pirate: "excuse me sir, but why do you have a steering wheel in your pants?". And the pirate responds: "arrrrrr, it's drivin me nuts".