Ranking the Top 10 Summer Sports

Wynn-McDonaldby:Wynn McDonald07/04/22

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The Fourth of July is upon us once again, and with it, the height of summertime in America. We’ve fallen into a familiar pattern: warm weather, cold beverages, and the Cincinnati Reds well out of playoff contention. Here at KSR, this is what we call the slow season. But don’t fret, fellow sports fans — there’s still plenty to complain about!

For example, there’s no better time to partake in one of the great American traditions: arguing about what is and isn’t a sport. If you’re on Twitter, you may have seen the U.S. Open Twitter account engaging in such a discussion this weekend. It didn’t work out too well for that guy (or Drew Lock, for that matter), but it was certainly entertaining.

In the spirit of this tradition, I decided to jot down some of my own thoughts on the subject. What is a summer sport? I say, any annual event or league that plays out primarily during the summer months. I urge you to consider these non-definitive rankings, and tell me why I’m wrong.

10. The PGA Tour

I’m not a golf guy, per se. But from what I understand, it’s a great outlet for unathletic people who compete professionally at a nice and slow pace. And in this heat, why should anyone hurry? Anyway, the PGA Tour is the premier American-based event in the sport, and three of its four major tournaments take place in the summer. Several of them are called “opens,” which is another thing I like, because it makes me feel like I could join if I wanted to. Shoutout to golf, the most inclusive of sports.

9. Fighting

Full disclosure, I know even less about combat sports than I do about golf. At this point, you’re probably wondering what qualifies me to write this post. The answer: absolutely nothing! Welcome to the internet. Still, something compelled me to include this genre of sports which, as far as I know, goes on year-round without interruption. Who doesn’t love watching people fight? It’s the most elemental human form of entertainment. Call it whatever you want — UFC, MMA, boxing, it doesn’t matter. Put it in front of me and I’ll become instantly invested. WORLDSTAR!

8. The AAU Circuit

True hoop heads know that basketball never stops. KSR’s ace recruiting team, led by Jack Pilgrim and Zack Geoghegan, has been following John Calipari’s private jet all over the country this summer to bring you all the juicy insider insights you can handle. It’s been great for those of us with a smaller travel budget, because we can almost feel like we’re there, too! Even from a distance, the AAU summer circuit is always a blast. It’s a chance for the nation’s top high-schoolers to showcase their skills against real competition, and for coaches, to showcase their summer fashion choices. What’s not to love?

7. College Football Sh*t Talk Season

College football is one of the shortest major American sports in duration, lasting a little over four months. But those four months are so memorable, we never seem to stop talking about them. The true college football calendar can be broken down into four continuous segments: the preseason (July-Aug.), the actual season (Sept.-Jan.), the spring season (Feb.-April), and the sh*t-talking season (May-June). This season begins when the transfer portal closes, includes spring meetings, and continues until we start having real things to talk about again. This year’s sh*t-talking season was one of the greatest ever, thanks to Jimbo Fisher:

6. NBA Summer League/Free Agency

It’s often overlooked, but the NBA’s offseason is one the most entertaining of all major sports. Now that the Playoffs extend into mid-June, we jump from that to draft, then proceed to belly flop right into Summer League action. What’s so great about the Summer League? Only the greatest overreaction season this side of NFL training camp. As sports fans, the only thing we love more than declaring what is and isn’t a sport is declaring who is and isn’t a bust (the sooner, the better). Remember the Summer of Kyle Kuzma? What about when Trae Young airballed his first two shots as a Hawk, and was nearly booed off the court? These are priceless basketball memories.

Throw in the fact that NBA free agency officially begins around the same time, and you’ve got yourself a gumbo of content. No matter the year, there’s always a trending story about Kevin Durant, Kyrie Irving or somebody else being unnecessarily dramatic. This year, it just happens to be both of them.

5. The WNBA

Say what you will, but these days the women’s game produces more compelling action than the men’s. If you’re looking to catch up, next Sunday’s All-Star Game is a good place to start — especially if you enjoy watching Rhyne Howard dominate (and who doesn’t?). That’s right, the former Kentucky star is already running with the best of the best as a rookie. Howard’s ascension to stardom for the Atlanta Dream this summer has been undeniable, and the world is starting to take notice. You should buy stock yesterday.

4. Horse Racing

You could argue this is a spring sport, but with the Belmont Stakes running in June, I’m counting it. Quite simply, there’s no more noble pursuit than betting large amounts of money on horses to run fast. I could elaborate on that fact, but I don’t even think it’s necessary. You get it.

3. Cornhole

Moving away from spectator sports for a moment, I had to include this classic summer tradition. Some call it “bags” or “sacks.” Those people are wrong. Regardless, it’s a beautifully pure game built on the principles of fair competition, precision, and the God-given right to hold a Cold One in your other hand the whole dang time. You can play it in your yard, you can play it on the beach, hell, you can play it on a boat if you want. All that matters is the bags and boards, baby.

2. Baseball

Ohhhhh! Didn’t see this one coming, did ya? America’s Pastime has kept a tight grip on Summertime viewing for many years, but it’s not my No 1. Not today. Still, I’ll always love baseball for its consistency. No matter the day, no matter the task at hand, there is a ball game on my TV when I need it; and in times like these, we need it more than ever. Some folks say it’s too slow for today’s world. But if you ask me, the only thing wrong with the sport is that it doesn’t go on forever.

Former MLB Commissioner Barlett Giamatti once wrote: “[Baseball] is designed to break your heart… You count on it, rely on it to buffer the passage of time, to keep the memory of sunshine and high skies alive, and then just when the days are all twilight, when you need it most, it stops.” Well said, Bart. Well said.

And yet…

Honorable Mentions: Tennis, MLS, Motorsports, and “Is Tom Brady Retiring?Debates

1. Hot Dog Eating

“THE CHAMPION OF THE WORLD; OF NOW AND ALWAYS; OF THE AIR, OF THE FIRE, OF THE SEA, OF THE LAND OF THE FREE… LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, JOEYYYYYYY CHESTNUT!” — George Shea, this Monday afternoon.

Folks, it’s that time again. Earlier today, the 2022 Nathan’s Famous Hot Dog Eating Contest was held at Coney Island. If you didn’t see it — or you missed the 10th ANNUAL KSR HOT DOG CONTEST LIVE BLOG — I’m happy to reveal that this year’s winner, for the 15th time in 16 years, was Joey “Jaws” Chestnut. He may not have broken his record this year, but pounding dozens of hot dogs is a remarkable feat on any occasion, much less in 10 minutes.

If you’ve never seen the hot dog contest, it truly belongs among the greatest and most disgusting American spectacles ever invented. How do you even recover from watching a man scarf down 70+ sausages in so little time? Is your life not forever changed from that point onward? Look upon this man, and tell me he isn’t the greatest athlete you’ve ever seen. You can’t, that’s just the truth.

Competitive eating is the most American sport ever invented. Happy 4th of July, y’all.

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2024-04-26