Hear Ye! Hear Ye!!! Cream Talk by Stallion - Week 8

Sep 8, 2004
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Good Sunday to you Six Pack!

What is the definition of defense? It is the capability of resisting someone’s attack. In terms of the cream talk, the ones that resist the most seem to rise to the top. The Stallion isn’t referring to that sissy football that they play in the BIG 12 or the PAC-12, where the first team to reach 60 points MAY win the game. Really??? Is this where college football is now. </SPAN>

The Stallion is a believer that the team that holds their opponent to 14 points or less is truly the Cream. Hence the top teams of the Cream Rankings fall into these categories. Look at West Virginia, Texas, your beloved Black Bears, and even the Dawgs of Georgia. Yes, they were sexy in their style of offense. But if you dig deeper into the soul, they aren’t much different than any super model that has legs that go on for days and an inner being that is made of stone. Chris Rock would reference this sort of woman as “someone you wouldn’t hesitate to shake ‘em to death”. That style will make teams compete every now and then when the talent improves but it isn’t sustainable.
</SPAN>
That’s why when you look on a national perspective, the Oregons, the Kansas States, the Oklahomas, and the USCw Trojans won’t live up to the smashmouth styles that make up the top leaders of the Cream Rankings. Alabama and LSU have consistently shown that you win championships with defense. Auburn was the rarity, but it took a man-beast to prove the Stallion’s theory wrong and two years removed, the head honcho will be forced out of the plains. That sort of philosophy just doesn’t flourish in the Cream League of all of the Land.</SPAN>

And now the Stallion has accepted, that’s why Florida is now getting into the mix. The defense and special teams is for real in the Swamp, and they force turnovers. LSU has proven year over year, you can win ugly and without a competent quarterback. Who knew that there was a worse quarterback in Baton Rouge than Lee and Jefferson. And look at Bama! They haven’t had a star at QB since Joe Namath and Kenny Stabler. It just isn’t necessary. What is necessary to be Cream is a defense that dominates.</SPAN>
The Cream rankings are as follows for Week 8.
</SPAN>
#1) </SPAN>Alabama Crimson Tide</SPAN> – They show signs of vulnerability but in reality, probably will cruise into the SEC Championship game.</SPAN>

#2) </SPAN>Florida Gators </SPAN>– If you can score 21 points on 29 yards of offense, then you might be a Cream-neck.

#3) </SPAN>LSU Tigers</SPAN> – Ugly is the new beautiful. If anyone knows how to play football, LSU will be taking tryouts because they are running out of players.</SPAN>

#4) </SPAN>South Carolina Gamecocks </SPAN>– The OBC thought you could just go into the swamp and chuck it around and see what happens. I think when he said “chuck” he was referring to the pass and not the fumble. No Lattimore equals no cream for the Cocks. Did I just say that?

#5) </SPAN>Mississippi State Bulldogs </SPAN>– Now the season begins! Is the #5 ranking worthy?

#6) </SPAN>Georgia Bulldogs </SPAN>– Richt can thank the SEC commish for providing them with the easiest schedule in the SEC. Otherwise, the Dawgs may be in the 9 or 10 range in the Cream Rankings.</SPAN>

#7) </SPAN>Texas A&M</SPAN> – Little Johnny Football has a bright future, mainly because he won’t have to see Barkevious Mingo or Sam Montgomery anymore in his career.
</SPAN>
#8) </SPAN>Arkansas Razorbacks</SPAN> – “SMILE. SMIIIIILE!!!!” (John L. is smiling because the spotlight is off of the Razorbacks.
</SPAN>
#9) </SPAN>Ole Miss Rebels</SPAN> – The Bears are moving up mainly because the rest sucks.</SPAN>

#10) Vanderbilt Commodores</SPAN> – Chizik, you've been Franklin-ed. You lose to the Dores, then you probably lose your job.

#11) </SPAN>Tennessee Vols</SPAN> – Yes, Bobby, how do you look in Orange?
</SPAN>
#12) </SPAN>Missouri Tigers </SPAN>– Licking their wounds in the off week. </SPAN>

#13) </SPAN>Auburn Tigers </SPAN>– Waving the white toilet paper at Toomer’s Corner. But that is one of surrender.</SPAN>

#14) </SPAN>Kentucky Wildcats </SPAN>– Has just forgotten how to win. Plain and simple.

HOT BOUDIN – Florida Gators - The Stallion has officially opened his mind to the Gators as painful as that may be, but this team will challenge the Tide (or the Tigers) for the Cream Championship with that defense….okay okay (or the Bulldogs)

COLD COOSH COOSH – Auburn Cheezesticks – Turn out the lights the party is over. Back to back cold coosh coosh is no way to respond from a Rebel loss. The perennial doormats in Nashville are now your superiors.</SPAN>

Love,
Stallion</SPAN>
 

TUSK.sixpack

Redshirt
Mar 3, 2008
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Stallion, TUSK would like to know your take on the upcoming Saban Bowl...

will the Mad Hatter be able to get by on Luck and big plays again this time, or is the disparity between to teams too great, in your opinion?
 
Sep 8, 2004
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State needs to show me something against...

A meaningful team.

South Carolina has already slaughtered Georgia. Lattimore being out yesterday was a downer for the Cocks but like them against every team below them in the rankings.
 
Sep 16, 2012
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The crust matters if you're ranking in a serious manner...

..but since this is nothing but a weekly feature meant to pimp LSU, I guess it doesn't matter.
 
Sep 8, 2004
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Last year in Tuscaloosa there was no luck or trick plays. It was a war among wars with those two defenses. The fact that this game is in Death Valley gives the Tigers a chance but offensively we are not as good this year obviously. Neither is Bama's defense though. I don't think it matters until Mettenberger and the LSU receivers can open the field up. If they can't, Bama wins by 14. If they can, LSU can pull it out. Keep in mind that Bama hasn't played a good defense yet either and they have injuries too.

im looking forward to it and also looking for two tickets.
 
Aug 5, 2011
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I can't argue with this week's rankings...

I will say that there is a significant gap between #1 Bama and #2 LSU. LSU is not scary and most teams will play them well because their offense is average at best and struggle to score consistently. Bama is a much better team in all aspects...As far as USCe and State, USCe having to play LSU and UF back to back is tough and it showed.
 

JackShephard

Senior
Sep 27, 2011
1,483
603
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Johnny football and his 21 minions are better that UGa. They should probably be ahead of us because that type of QB/offense generally shreds us.
 

karlchilders.sixpack

All-Conference
Jun 5, 2008
19,693
3,771
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I'm likeing States chances to skin your cats!

Yeah, we have a tough one this weekend, but by the time we get to you guys, you may have the waterboy in.

And, I think State has enough depth to stand up to your running game.
 

TUSK.sixpack

Redshirt
Mar 3, 2008
2,548
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Latt played a good amount... they made a gametime decision to play him apparently...

he was <100% tho...
 

TUSK.sixpack

Redshirt
Mar 3, 2008
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you need to go back and watch that game through a rear view mirror... there was "a lot" of fortunate plays...

I think it's a given that LSU won't be able to score much, if any, on the Tide (barring explosive plays and/or turnovers)...

The key will be if AJ can keep his offense on the field long enough to wear down LSU's D like they did in the BCSNG...

Yall really have had some bad luck RE injuries tho... week off should help!
 
Sep 8, 2004
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I think SCs defense is better than States D. LSU ran over the Cocks. At LSU, I like the Tigers to do the same pending outcome health wise against Bama. State is playing LSU at the best possible time though.
 

JackShephard

Senior
Sep 27, 2011
1,483
603
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Why don't you worry about this week's game first, asshat? At least on OUR message board. This is...ah 17 it.
 
Sep 8, 2004
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Tusk LSU had the best chance of scoring a TD last year had Shepard not falling down inside the 10 after he caught a pass from Jefferson I believe. Bama didn't get inside the 30. It was a great defensive game and all in all very even. I'm sure you see things crimson much like I see purple chances in that game.
 

MSDawg34

Redshirt
Aug 30, 2011
1,080
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Saying the best teams at the end of the season will be reflected in the standings is not "cream rising to the top" it's common sense as its the only possible outcome. There's still no theory. "The cream rises to the top" = "The best teams win" Once again I'll point out its a "Well no ****" theory

As to USCe above us, laugh out loud.
 

hotdigitydog

Redshirt
May 21, 2007
4,728
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Now, please admit that yor crystal ball was wrong last week......HOW MANY on

here tried to tell you UF was number two but NOOOOO said the Stallion.......Come on, you're pretty decent at this but you must admit when you're wrong and you WERE wrong........
 

TUSK.sixpack

Redshirt
Mar 3, 2008
2,548
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It's not Stallion's fault... He's using "Crystal Ball 07"...

I offered him my 09 version as I have updated to 2011 and have 2012 on backorder.
 

mcdawg22

Heisman
Sep 18, 2004
13,037
10,354
113
What? Florida ahead of South Carolina? Surely that can't be the case even though all empirical evidence proves it so. Guess that's why it's a Cream THEORY and not a law. I think the OBC has at least one more loss in his back pocket.
 

skb124

Redshirt
Jul 20, 2008
1,270
0
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Yep like Denard Robinson and Cam Newton..... What are you talking about? When was the last time a scrambler hurt us? We beat A&M by 10+
 

patdog

Heisman
May 28, 2007
56,219
25,311
113
Move Tennessee up to #8 and move Arkansas, Mississippi, and Vanderbilt down 1 each. Otherwise, pretty good rankings. I see you've come around to agree with me about Florida. I think your Tigers showed everyone the blueprint on how to defend Johnny Football. Don't rush him, just contan him and force him to beat you with his arm. He will give you some turnovers. If you try to pressure him, he will kill you with his arm and his legs.
 

RougeDawg

Redshirt
Jul 12, 2010
1,474
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LSU is horrible and luckiest team in Western Hemisphere...

No way you can honestly rank them ahead of an undefeated SEC team after watching that abortion of a game yesterday.

Bama
Florida
State
LSU
South Carolina
Georgia
Crust....


Take off your boudin glasses, turn off swamp people, and watch some other teams/games and make a realistic ranking.
 

patdog

Heisman
May 28, 2007
56,219
25,311
113
A&M is feasting on the bad defenses, but they struggle against good defenses. UGA would beat A&M 41-24 on a neutral field.
 

patdog

Heisman
May 28, 2007
56,219
25,311
113
One thing about last year's LSU-Bama game in Tuscaloosa that doesn't get mentioned much is that Saban gave LSU over 100 yards of free field position by trying 55-yard FGs when he should have punted 3 or 4 times. If he playes it smart, he punts, pins LSU back on their 10 and then gets the ball back on LSU's side of the field instead of missing a long FG and then getting the ball back on his own 25.
 

skb124

Redshirt
Jul 20, 2008
1,270
0
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UGAs defense isn't any good either though.

I actually think that would be a game like Georgia-Tennessee
 

patdog

Heisman
May 28, 2007
56,219
25,311
113
Mississippi held A&M to 30. And don't give me the yeah, but 6 turnovers excuse either. Turnovers are what A&M does. Other than the Tennessee game, UGA's defense has been OK this year. I think they could hold A&M to 6 less than Mississippi did.
 

patdog

Heisman
May 28, 2007
56,219
25,311
113
LSU's not quite as good as they have been the last few years. But they're still a damn good football team. Let's start talking about how we should be ranked ahead of them until we beat them. Until then, you've got to go with LSU #3 in the SEC.
 
Sep 8, 2004
1,003
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There's a chance that could happen but what I have always said about MSU is that Russell takes a lot of sacks and holds on the ball a looooong time. Against defenses like LSU and Bama that could spell DOOM! I also don't think State has faced a backfield like LSU or Bama. If State gets LSU to pass and force TOs then they have a great shot of winning
 

drt7891

Redshirt
Dec 6, 2010
6,727
0
0
I think State is 4th. I just think you are putting too much stock in South Carolina beating Georgia. UGA beat TN (barely), and got BLOWN OUT South Carolina... but South Carolina is pulling a WV on offense. Other than South Carolina, Georgia doesn't have any more than State does in terms of wins (You even mention their easy schedule). Give State a little bump for at least being undefeated to this point. My rankings would look like:

1. Bama
2. UF
3. LSU
4. State
5. USCe

LSU continues to play insane defense and Miles continues to be the luckiest SOB in the conference. I will also give you credit for saying State has not played anyone of real merit yet (a ranked opponent). I fully expect to lose to Bama, but the last 4 games will really show us where State is. I'm trying to look at it as objectively as I can.. but you are doing an undefeated State team an injustice by having a 2 loss USCe team ranked above them (who still has a chance to lose a game or two before the season ends... UT and @Clempson).

I also think Kentucky is above Auburn. If they played at a neutral site, I bet Kentucky wins 7 out of 10 times.