The Envelope, Please: Week 9 Awards

Every week, I’ll scan the nation and hand out awards. Without further ado … the envelope, please.
GAMES
Play this again: No. 8 Ole Miss 34, No. 13 Oklahoma 26
Never play this again: Utah 53, Colorado 7
What? Wake Forest 13, SMU 12
Huh? Kansas State 42, Kansas 17
Are you kidding me? Washington 42, No. 23 Illinois 25
Oh. My. God: Houston 24, No. 24 Arizona State 16
Told you so: No. 3 Texas A&M 49, No. 20 LSU 25
COACHES
Wish I was him: Clark Lea, Vanderbilt
Glad I’m not him: Brian Kelly, LSU
Lucky guy: Tony Elliott, Virginia
Poor guy: Jeff Lebby, Mississippi State
Desperately seeking a P.R. man: Brent Key, Georgia Tech
Desperately seeking sunglasses and a fake beard: Alex Golesh, South Florida
Desperately seeking … anything: Barry Odom, Purdue
TEAMS
Thought you’d kick butt, you did: Tennessee
Thought you’d kick butt, you didn’t: Texas
Thought you’d get your butt kicked, you did: UCLA
Thought you’d get your butt kicked, you didn’t: Wisconsin
Dang, they’re good: BYU
Dang, they’re bad: Boston College
Did the season start? West Virginia
Can the season never end? Alabama
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